Commentary:
"Guess we'll have to stick to a 'knight in shining armor' theme, but your accent's still jousting all over the UK! 😂🏰🌍 #AccentuateThePositive"
112 Funny sex quotes
Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.
Commentary:
I didn’t see this in the Bible study guide, but I’m definitely interested in the director’s cut. 😂📖🐶
Reverse cowgirl is not a fair trade because, why do you get a view of my sexy back, and all I’m seeing are your toes throwing gang signs?
Commentary:
"When you're expecting a romantic view but get toe-tally surprised instead! 🤦♂️👣🤣"
If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?
Commentary:
"Guess it's God's way of saying, 'Have fun while you're at it!' 😂🌟🍑"
Another day without sex, but a mosquito just sucked on my neck and I moaned a little bit.
Commentary:
"Guess even mosquitoes know how to make an impression! 😂🦟💋"
The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.
Commentary:
"Why settle for a nerve-racking experience when you can have a nerve-tingling one instead? 😉😂 #TheGoodNerves"
Kitchen sex, because it might be your only chance of getting laid on an island this summer.
Commentary:
"Well, time to invest in some non-stick cookware and start sizzling! 🔥🍳😏 #IslandEscapades"
Using a condom and still pulling out, call that two-factor authentication.
Commentary:
"LOL, taking security to the next level! Talk about a double lock system! 😂🔐 #TrustIssues"
Sex is cool, but have you ever found an academic article that fits your research topic perfectly and supports all of your claims?
Commentary:
"Forget soulmates, I’m just looking for source-mates! 📚❤️🤣 #AcademicLove"
I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?
Commentary:
"Guess it's time to learn puppy love all over again! 🐶😂 #BarkInsteadOfBite"