Funny sperm quotes

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Whenever you are feeling down, remember you’re the sperm that won.

  Commentary:
  "Next time you're feeling low, just remember – you're the Michael Phelps of sperm! Keep swimming, champ!"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the trials and tribulations of being a speedy little swimmer in your past life 🏊‍♂️ Now it's all about taking it slow and enjoying the race at your own pace 🐢 Embrace your lazy greatness, former champion!"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Sperm me would be swimming in the other direction.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like Sperm-me is a rebel with a cause! 🏊‍♂️🔄 Who said swimming upstream wasn't cool? 😎"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?

  Commentary:
  Well, it's not like you can leave a voicemail saying, "Sorry, I'm not feeling very productive today." 🙈💦 Just imagine the awkwardness of that phone call – "Hello, yes, I need to cancel my reservation at the sperm bank… No, no reason in particular, I'm just feeling a bit… drained?" 😂 It definitely raises some intriguing logistical questions!

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to cancel my appointment at a sperm bank. I will just call them and say I can’t come.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like someone's pulling out of their responsibilities at the sperm bank! 🙈 Talk about a 'missed opportunity'! 😂💦"

For even more funny sperm quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny sperm quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌