Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Introducing the master of memory lapses and forgetting names faster than a squirrel on caffeine! 🤷‍♂️💥 Say hello to the Forget-Me-Not King/Queen! 🤣👑 #NameGameStrong"

2, after, awkwardness, forgetting, interaction, me, memory, move, name, seconds, signature, signature move, social, social interaction, tell

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Inventor of pink lemonade: yes, exactly the same, but cute and for the girls.

0

2 months ago

beverage, branding, cute, exactly, girls, humor, inventor, inventors, lemonade, pink, pink lemonade, playful, same, yes
Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

0

2 months ago

dollars, floor, food, great, having, humor, i, kids, little, love, money, parenting, spending, trash, week
Terrible economy to ask a girl what’s wrong.

0

2 months ago

ask, communication, dating, economy, girl, humor, joke, relationship, terrible, wrong
I become the most financially irresponsible person in the world the second I step into a Japanese stationary store.

0

19 hours ago

buying, financial, financial irresponsibility, i, impulse, impulse buying, irresponsibility, irresponsible, Japanese, most, person, second, shopping, stationary, stationary store, step, store, world
A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.

0

2 months ago

baseball, case, designated, designated hitter, drunk, everyone, hit, hitter, humor, sports, sports humor, team
Imagine Pinocchio roasting you for 5 mins straight and his nose didn’t move an inch.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, comedy, humor, imagination, imagine, joke, move, nose, Pinocchio, puppet, roasting, satire, straight

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Only thing that can cure my depression is $500 million.

13 shares on Slack this month:

Before marrying someone, listen long and hard to the sounds of their chewing, because that’s the soundtrack to the rest of your life.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3 a.m., coming back from the club.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

Congratulations on angrily speeding past me to get to the red light first. You’re special.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

Sure, I could keep my thoughts to myself but I can’t see “Likes” in my journal.

42 shares on Telegram this month:

No, baby, I’m not dumping you. I’m just rebranding myself as your ex.

93 shares on Telegram this month:

I hate how everything is organic now. I miss chemicals.

95 shares on Snapchat this month:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

45 shares on Discord this month:

If ever go missing, please only put pictures of me on the news where I look skinny and hot even if that means they won’t find me.

68 shares on Snapchat this month:

Everyone hates drama, yet somehow the tabloids remain in business.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Wow, you did such a great job clicking in your little spreadsheets today. Super proud of you.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Still holding out hope that these intrusive thoughts are just gas.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

If my son ever came out as gay, I’d be so furious. Furious that he never gave me fashion advice.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

If my house is clean, just know I yelled at everyone for two hours first.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

The only exercise I done last month was running out of money.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

You want me to attend a work meeting? The thing that killed Julius Caesar?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I sent you a message telepathically and you didn’t respond. Are you mad at me?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Seen just now on Twitch:

If you comment to say “No comment,” you have, in fact, commented.

Spotted on TikTok:

Your problems are neither sexual nor spiritual, they are gastrointestinal.

Going viral on Reddit:

My love language is deader than Latin.

Breaking via Facebook:

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

Just shared via Facebook:

All this suffering on earth because someone ate an apple once.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Reverse cowgirl so I can post selfies.

Making waves on Facebook:

Unfortunately, I don’t give ugly men a chance, because they wouldn’t give me one if I were the ugly one.

Just shared via Discord:

At the self-checkout, I make small talk with myself and I wish I would just shut up.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Inventor of pink lemonade: yes, exactly the same, but cute and for the girls.

Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

Terrible economy to ask a girl what’s wrong.

I become the most financially irresponsible person in the world the second I step into a Japanese stationary store.

A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.

Imagine Pinocchio roasting you for 5 mins straight and his nose didn’t move an inch.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨