Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

I miss my bed. Why does it have to be so far from where I work?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

I need a browser plugin that disables Amazon when I’m drinking. Hashtag: don’t drink and Prime.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

My favourite thing about waking up at ridiculous o’clock is the solitude.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Dear recipe websites. I don’t need your life story. Just give me the recipe.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I was having a great Friday until I found out it was Thursday.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Did you get the telepathic message I sent earlier?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Every time the universe sends me a sign, I’m like, okay, but I think I’ll wait for a signier sign.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

4,010

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

But if I get tinted windows, how will people see me flipping them off?

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

Seen just now on WeChat:

I often wonder how men could discover entire continents. Mine can’t even find the butter in the fridge.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Back in my day, we had to walk to the TV to change the channel. Uphill, both ways!

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

Just landed via Pinterest:

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Don’t worry. You’re exactly where you should be in life. Because you’ve made horrible choices.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I forgot how weird November is. There’s no afternoon; it’s just night after 3 p.m.

More funny quotes 👇

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

0

1 day ago

childhood, enough, family, humor, kid, kids, old, parent, parenting, problem
It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

0

1 day ago

energy, exhaustion, humor, inside, much, retail, shopping, store, Walmart
Having a dirty mind and an innocent face is truly a blessing.

1

1 day ago

blessing, contrast, dirty, dirty mind, face, having, humor, innocent, innocent face, mind, personality, truly
Too shy for influencing. Too dumb for crypto. Too honest for a scam. Too lazy for 9-5. How can I make money?

0

4 days ago

9-5, 9-5 job, 95, crypto, dumb, honesty, i, influencer, influencing, job, laziness, lazy, making, making money, money, scam, self-doubt, shy, shyness, too
People don’t hate working, they hate working and still being poor.

3

4 days ago

being, frustration, hate, humor, income, job, money, people, poor, poverty, still, work, working
No ChatGPT for me, thanks. I will be asking Liam Gallagher on Twitter.

1

4 days ago

asking, celebrity, ChatGPT, gallagher, humor, i, liam, Liam Gallagher, me, media, social, social media, thanks, Twitter
The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

1

4 days ago

finance, humor, i, money, need, patience, urgency
I’m an adult in the same way that Katy Perry is an astronaut.

0

4 days ago

adult, astronaut, celebrity, comparison, humor, identity, katy, Katy Perry, perry, same, space
How much longer do we have to keep pretending that Pilates isn’t a sex thing?

0

4 days ago

fitness, humor, joke, keep, longer, much, Pilates, pretend, pretending, sex, thing
There’s no better feeling than coming home and immediately changing into your Adam Sandler fit.

0

4 days ago

Adam, Adam Sandler, better, change, change clothes, changing, clothes, comfort, coming, feeling, fit, home, outfit, relaxation, sandler

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Slack this month:

Does no one disappear in the Bermuda Triangle anymore, or is there just too much other news?

47 shares on X this month:

If I were an organ, I’d fail.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Yes, money alone does not make you happy. It has to be yours too.

96 shares on X this month:

Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.

45 shares on X this month:

Is there a bravery award I can nominate my son for as he managed to eat his toast despite the fact I cut it wrong.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.

100 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

55 shares on Threads this month:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

100 shares on Reddit this month:

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

Calling it a situationship, and the whole time, the situation is that they don’t want you.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

My future husband is very lucky; he will never stay hungry, because I know so many restaurants with delicious food.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying things like, “That’s a pretty building.”

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Not to be dramatic, but when I accidentally save a file twice and it adds that (1) at the end, it is the worst moment of my life.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

99% of celebrating your birthday as an adult just consists of texting back “thanks so much”.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

The only reason to engage with a neighbor is if either of you is on fire.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Turning in bad essays to professors you have a personal relationship with is the most humiliating thing ever.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Sometimes I use big words I don’t always fully understand, in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

When I say “I hate drama”, I mean I hate being involved in drama. Other people’s drama? Big fan!

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

Twitter is basically like a mental institution where everyone thinks they’re the sane one, and everybody else is crazy.

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m no expert, but I don’t think the United Kingdom is very united.

Going viral on Reddit:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I once hated my job so much that I would come home from work and watch vlogs of people quitting their jobs, wishing it was me.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

25 is the new 0 years old.

Making waves on WeChat:

Mario Kart gave me unrealistic expectations of how banana peels affect traffic.

Seen just now on Slack:

This gratitude journal looks a lot like a grocery list.

Broadcasted on X:

Sure the Lego botanical sets are great but dusting them is another story.

Trending via Facebook:

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

Spotted on Telegram:

The difference between a biography and an autobiography is self-explanatory.

Activity Log ✨

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨