14 Funny assume quotes

• I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

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  4 weeks ago

  assume, everyone, finds, fun, humor, i, insecurity, interaction, issues, lying, me, otherwise, sarcasm, self-doubt, skepticism, social, social interaction, tell, trust, trust issues, unattractive, unattractiveness

• If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

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  4 weeks ago

  assume, communication, distracted, distraction, got, humor, i, message, reply, response, texting

• It’s truly insane when bosses assume their employees are working for any reason other than a paycheck.

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  1 month ago

  assume, assumption, boss, employee, employees, humor, insane, job, motivation, office, paycheck, reason, truly, work, working

• Not gonna lie, I just assume everyone is AI now.

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  1 month ago

  AI, assume, assumption, everyone, humor, i, just, lie, life, modern, modern life, technology

• When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

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  1 month ago

  assume, block, confidence, good, humor, i, jawline, just, killer, looks, me, media, people, personality, rugged, rugged look, social, social media

• I assume people who bookmark my posts are building a case against me.

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  1 month ago

  assume, bookmark, building, case, humor, humorist, i, me, media, people, posts, social, social media, suspicion

• I assume my soulmate has sold his soul to the devil.

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  1 month ago

  assume, devil, humor, i, irony, sold, soul, soulmate, supernatural

• People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

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  1 month ago

  assume, assumption, bold, confidence, enough, even, happening, humor, night, people, routine, shower, tomorrow

• I assume fish have beautiful names for eachother, unpronounceable by human tongues.

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  1 month ago

  assume, beautiful, beauty, fish, human, humor, i, names, tongues, unpronounceable

• At this point, if you buy Tesla, everyone is just going to assume you are a loser.

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  1 month ago

  assume, assumption, buy, everyone, going, humor, just, loser, point, Tesla

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