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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ has shared:

People who take naps are the real heroes. It takes courage to wake up twice in one day.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฟ has viewed:

“Nah.” – everyone with an office job, from the Monday after Thanksgiving until January 2nd.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has viewed:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has shared:

Men be like, โ€œOk, you wanna know the truth,โ€ and lie even harder.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฆ has viewed:

It’s officially Christmas shopping season, and I can’t even afford my own life.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side Iโ€™m on?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

A massage is not enough, I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ผ has viewed:

SEO experts be like: I was eating a banana when my traffic increased, so bananas are definitely a ranking factor.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has viewed:

Hey girl, do you like my signals? I mixed them myself.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡พ has bookmarked:

Twitter is cool because you can figure out what’s going on in the world through memes instead of watching the news.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,432

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Shared recently on Slack:

I had a sex dream last night that felt so real, I’m just gonna go ahead and add it to my body count.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

Trending via Instagram:

Cowboy outfits should be called ranch dressing.

Just shared via X:

Love that every time I finish a snack I have to wave my hands around to prove to my dog itโ€™s all gone, like Iโ€™m cashing him out at a casino or something.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when itโ€™s empty.

Going viral on Slack:

The closest thing Iโ€™ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Pizza crusts go uneaten, but people will devour an entire pan of breadsticks.

Going viral on WeChat:

Oxygen was discovered in 1773. How did our ancestors breathe before then?

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

These people act like theyโ€™ve never seen anyone wearing a Speedo in a laundromat before.

Breaking via Telegram:

Let’s just call ourselves divorced now and skip the stressful, expensive bit in the middle.

508 Funny dating quotes

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Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars โญ

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

You don’t have to be crazy to be friends with me. I also train people.

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Go ahead and get some sleep, everyone. Iโ€™ll stay up and handle the overthinking.

44 shares on WeChat this month:

I keep forgetting iโ€™m at the age where people will tell me theyโ€™re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

18 shares on YouTube this month:

Sorry boys, but Iโ€™ve already got my eyes on a guy whoโ€™s not interested.

10 shares on Twitch this month:

Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

55 shares on Reddit this month:

WW3 is either gonna happen so fast you sleep through it, or it’s gonna last for the rest of your life.

29 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Love when people summon Grok and there’s no reply. He just doesn’t care sometimes.

11 shares on Twitch this month:

I disagree with my politics.

47 shares on TikTok this month:

Shoutout to myself for ruining my own life.

60 shares on Slack this month:

I love that retail therapy works on me. I am so much happier and at peace when Iโ€™m buying things for myself.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

23 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

5 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Wish I could step out of my body and take my own damn pictures.

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Any room can be a rage room if you just give me a minute.

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

15 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

You never hear anything about Mr. Rubik himself, only about his cube.

9 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

5 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure Iโ€™m using them right.

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

You’re 25, stressing like you’re 40, because you want to be rich before 30, am I right?

18 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

When the moon hits your eye like it’s 5:45, that’s November.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,350

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

Everybody has a girlfriend and a boyfriend, and I’m over here like “I love food”.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ถ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has downloaded:

Why do men always think โ€œlooking for funโ€ means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has bookmarked:

One day you’ll find someone obsessed with you. It’s probably going to be a squirrel.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ผ has bookmarked:

Typos is the Greek god of spelling errors.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ณ has shared:

People that I dislike shouldn’t be allowed to consume the media that I like.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ด has copied:

Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has viewed:

Had to sit with a straight face while my landlord told me I was paying his rent and mortgage for him.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ช has shared:

“I bought this while depressed” should be an acceptable reason to get a full refund on a return.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡น has copied:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Seen just now on Reddit:

Which wine pairs best with WWIII?

Making waves on Messenger:

Every email sent to me should end with ‘but if your tummy is hurting, donโ€™t worry about it.’

Going bananas on Twitch:

Most men donโ€™t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

Going viral on TikTok:

Really hate when I’m watching a movie, and I can see that they are acting.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Before I start seeing a psychiatrist, does anyone like me crazy?

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

At the club asking for Ibuprofen.

Going viral on Twitch:

Arab perfumes have zero chillโ€ฆ the entire street knows youโ€™ve arrived.

Going viral on Threads:

Is there a bravery award I can nominate my son for as he managed to eat his toast despite the fact I cut it wrong.

Just shared via Pinterest:

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

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