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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Due to not wanting to, I will not be.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

The one nice thing about your friends’ divorces is no one invites you to them.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Nothing humbles you faster than your phone slipping out of your hand and hitting your face.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Psych meds aren’t enough anymore. Hit me with a shovel.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Anything is free if you can outrun security. The more you know.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

30 minutes ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Just went to the Oreo website and hit “accept all cookies” … and now we wait.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I always mean what I say, I don’t always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.

Just landed via X:

I was gonna get on the treadmill, but then the couch will get sad.

Making waves on Threads:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

David Attenborough narrating my life: “He’s still sleeping.”

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I’d like to have a word with the groundhog before he starts working this year.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

Breaking via Twitch:

It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

Trending via WhatsApp:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

30 minutes ago

Users Online

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Your pronouns are “side/chick”.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I’ve decided to become an organ donor. When I die, I want an elephant to get a new trunk.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Can anyone recommend some good behaviors for someone who just started behaving?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Just broke a clothes hanger and now have seven years of bad outfits.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

It must be hard to be a rapper knowing at any moment your enemies may make beautiful poems about you.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Wearing white pants today, so it’s really just a matter of time before I spill something on myself.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Spotted on X:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Me leaving the house: I hope I don’t see anyone.

Breaking via Messenger:

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

Just landed via YouTube:

No matter how busy my Sunday gets, I always manage to set aside time to panic about Monday.

Just shared via Twitch:

As long as you’re still fishing fruit flies out of your drink, you’re not drunk.

Going viral on Threads:

Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

Reported on X:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Marriage is like a phone call at the night: First there’s the ring, and then you wake up.

Going viral on Pinterest:

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

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