Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: You can name literally any food or drink to the dentist and they’ll be like “ohhh, that’s actually so bad for your teeth. You should only eat water and toothpaste.”

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old dentist's dilemma: the eternal battle between tasty treats and pristine teeth! 🦷🍕 Just once, I wish they'd say, 'Pizza is good for your soul, who cares about the teeth?' 😆🍕 Keep smiling and flossing, folks!"
6 months ago
Share →: If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

Commentary:
"Eat well, exercise, and… surprise! You'll still end up kicking the bucket! 💪💀 Getting fit doesn't grant you an exemption from the inevitable, but hey, at least you'll go down looking fabulous 😂🏋️‍♂️ #FitAndFunkyTillTheEnd"
6 months ago
Share →: Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Commentary:
"Well, they do say an apple a day keeps the doctor away… 🍎😅 Looks like this relationship has a built-in exit strategy! Just make sure to save those apples for the right moment! 😉"
6 months ago
Share →: My doctor told me “good luck” and gave me finger guns, so obviously I’m dying.

Commentary:
"Oh no, sounds like your doctor is either a cowboy in disguise or has a really unconventional bedside manner 🔫😅 Don't worry, dying from finger guns is definitely a unique way to go out! Just remember to aim for the stars 🌟"
6 months ago
Share →: In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

Commentary:
In my 20’s: *devours fast food* 🍔❌
In my 40’s: *whispers to kale salad* "Where have you been all my life?" 🥗✨ #agingwisely
6 months ago
Share →: Too bad mosquitos are not into human fat the way they are into human blood.

Commentary:
Well, imagine if mosquitos had a refined taste for human fat! 🍔🦟 They could single-handedly revolutionize the weight loss industry, one bite at a time! 💪😆
6 months ago
Share →: Gonna get my eye looked at today. Usually it’s the other way around.

Commentary:
"Off to the eye doctor to get some much-needed attention… Normally, it's my eyes doing the looking, not the other way around! 👀😂 #RoleReversal #EyeSeeYou"
6 months ago
Share →: If you’re riding a bike in New York City, it means you care about your health. Riding one in Tennessee means you got a DUI.

Commentary:
"Riding a bike in New York City: Look Ma, no DUI! Riding in Tennessee: Just trying to stay sober…or pretending to be Lance Armstrong! 🚴‍♂️🚓"
6 months ago
Share →: Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.

Commentary:
"Spotted an ambulance at the hospital… I guess even the doctors need a lift sometimes! 🚑😅 Here's hoping they just lost their way to the cafeteria and not to a medical emergency! 🏥🙏"
6 months ago
Share →: Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

Commentary:
"Remember, it's better to be delightfully crazy than to end up in the dullsville of sanity! 🤪 Embrace your inner weirdness to avoid the risk of becoming a boring potato! 🥔 Stay fabulously mad, my friend! 💫"