Commentary:
The struggle is real when your inside voice wants to become your outside voice 😂🤐
5670 Funny i quotes
My children are very helpful. For example, when I ask them to do something, they suggest a different child that could do it instead.
Commentary:
Sounds like a game of "tag, you're it!" but with chores 😂🧹 #ParentingHacks
I want to live in a world where TV sitcoms have catchy theme songs again.
Commentary:
Cue the laugh track and bring back the jingles! Because nothing says nostalgia like a sing-along before the shenanigans start! 🎶😂📺
First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.
Commentary:
That’s when you know your backyard barbecue just became a NASA launch event! 🚀🎆😄
I’ve tasted long-term relationships, I’ve tasted casual dating. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 9 p.m. ..!
Commentary:
Sounds like the secret recipe for a successful life: less drama, more pajamas! 😴💼✨
I can’t go to war, I have to water my plants.
Commentary:
Priorities: Water the ficus or save the world? 🌿💦 Priorities! 😄
It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.
Commentary:
Forget the camel, I'm just here to find out if Carl has a Yelp rating 😂👐🐪
I wait all week for the weekend just to aggressively do nothing in five different outfits.
Commentary:
Sounds like my weekend agenda is fashionably on point: mastering the art of 'couch couture'! 😎👗🛋️
If I say I love you, it’s just the apocalypse talking.
Commentary:
If I suddenly declare my undying love, don't worry, it's just the end of the world as we know it! 💘🌍😂
My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.
Commentary:
Guess she used the ol' "plants need shade" argument! 🌿😎☀️