Commentary:
"Current situation: involuntarily becoming one with my thoughts 🧘♂️🤯 Can someone please ship an emergency playlist to the gym? 🎧😂"
Tag Archives: 5673 Funny i quotes
I did some soul searching last night. I’m happy to report I still have one.
Commentary:
"Glad you found it! Sometime they like to play hide and seek. 😄🕵️♂️✨"
I fear one day I’ll see one of my posts marked as an “Exhibit A”
Commentary:
"Just hope Exhibit B is my cat memes 😂📚🐱"
I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.
Commentary:
"Chasing the carrot and getting a free ride? Talk about multitasking! 🤔🥕🚜"
Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.
Commentary:
"Hotel towels: 1, my suitcase: 0. Maybe I'll just wear one on the plane! 🧳🛁😂"
I respect the moon because it controls three of our most precious entities: oceans, wolves & women.
Commentary:
"When the moon is out there herding wolves, women, and waves, you know it's under a lot of pressure! 🌕🐺🌊👩🦰"
I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.
Commentary:
"Keeping the peace one puff at a time! 🌿😌✌️ #SafetyFirst"
Not working on myself because I make better content this way.
Commentary:
"When life gives you flaws, turn them into plot twists! 😂📚 #UnfinishedMasterpiece"
Nothing rattles me like the difference between rows and columns, man. I hate it so much.
Commentary:
"When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion! 🚣♂️😂 #ExcelPanic"
I think some outfits just aren’t meant to be worn unless you’re getting straight into a car.
Commentary:
"Fashion tip: If your outfit requires a helicopter landing pad just to walk to your car, you're probably winning the runway game! 🚁👗😂"