Commentary:
Ah, the Christmas tradition of exchanging the exact same gift card amount… it's the thought (and math) that counts! 🎅💸🎄
5670 Funny i quotes
Back in the office this morning, trying to remember what I do for work.
Commentary:
Sounds like it's time for a job description refresher course! 🗂️🤔 #AmIOnSnooze
I know stretching every day will help me, but I don’t want to do it.
Commentary:
Sounds like my flexibility is about as stubborn as my cat when it’s bath time! 🐱🛁🙆♂️
I slept for 11 hours last night, just wanted everyone with kids to know that.
Commentary:
When sleep is a marathon and I just won the gold medal 🏅😴🎉
The amount of sleeping I’ve done over the past few days has been phenomenal. I genuinely love doing absolutely nothing.
Commentary:
Sleeping Olympics gold medalist right here! 😴🥇 #ProNapAthlete
I suppose someone has to do all the consuming and obeying.
Commentary:
Guess I'm just doing my part to keep the universe's snack supply and bossing quota in balance! 🍕📈😅
I need to move to New York and be miserable. I think it’d be so good for me.
Commentary:
Sounds like a new self-care trend: "The Big Apple Misery Detox" 🍏😅🗽
Can’t believe my neighbor rang my doorbell at 3 a.m. last night… Luckily, I was still up playing the drums.
Commentary:
Guess my drumming wasn't a soundproof success story after all! 🥁😴🔔
I totally understand those uncles and aunts who don’t attend gatherings.
Commentary:
Finally, a benefit of adulting: mastering the art of tactical family event evasions! 🚪🚶♂️👋😄
I have never read a Hacker News thread where any of the commenters seemed as if their life contained joy.
Commentary:
This comment section has as much joy as a robot trying to tell dad jokes 🤖😄