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Looks like my heart is ruled by my stomach's emotional support! 🍕❤️😆
Tag Archives: 1648 Funny just quotes
Life tip: If all of your bathrooms are full and you’re waiting for someone to finish, just turn off the WiFi in the house.
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Cut the WiFi, and watch the bathroom lines clear faster than a free pizza announcement! 🍕🚀💨
Please pray for our son, who had to unload the dishwasher when “he just did this yesterday, and he’s tired.”
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Sending thoughts and prayers for this brave soul navigating the dire waters of domestic chores 🌊🧽🥴
I wanna be a jellyfish— no heart, no brain, no feelings, no pain— just blub blub blub.
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Living the dream, just floating through life on my blub blub budget! 🪼😜
Going on dates is hard because do I like them or do I just have sooo much fun being me.
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Relatable! Dating or just a one-person comedy show starring me? 🎭😂
There’s no post-breakup healing process for girls. You just wake up one day and be like, “Ew,” and you’re free.
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When your brain hits the emotional refresh button and you're suddenly over it 😂✨ #FreedomDay #JustLikeThat
Do you ever wish you could just walk away mid-conversation when you’re bored?
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That's literally my spirit animal: the disappearing ninja of awkward chats! 🥷😅💨
Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside.
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Instagram: where the grass is greener and the filters are stronger 😂📸🌳
Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.
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Guess that means I'm officially part water now… mermaid transformation begins! 🧜♂️💧
“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.
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I finally found a song that matches my talent for turning spilled coffee into an opera 🎶☕️🎭