59 Funny lie quotes

• Babe, you have to believe me. I followed that porn star because I like her political views.

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  3 days ago

  babe, believe, dating, excuse, humor, i, lie, me, media, political, politics, porn, porn star, relationship, social, social media, star, views

• Being smart is a curse. You see the game, the lies, the patterns, but you still gotta play dumb to survive.

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  3 days ago

  being, curse, dumb, game, intelligence, lie, pattern, play, playing, playing dumb, smart, still, strategy, survival, survive

• I put my bathroom scale in the corner, and that’s where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.

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  3 days ago

  apology, bathroom, bathroom scale, corner, humor, i, joke, liar, lie, little, personification, put, scale, stay, weight, where

• I lied, there’s no sex. I just needed help getting out of my skinny jeans.

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  3 days ago

  clothing, fashion, getting, help, honesty, humor, i, jean, jeans, just, lie, relationship, sex, skinny, skinny jean, struggle

• I lied, there’s no sex. Can you tell me a bedtime story?

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  3 days ago

  bedtime, bedtime story, conversation, humor, i, joke, lie, me, relationship, sex, story, tell

• I lied. There’s no sex. Can you help me put this fitted sheet on my mattress?

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  4 days ago

  bedroom, domestic, domestic task, fitted, fitted sheet, help, honesty, humor, i, lie, mattress, me, put, relationship, sex, sheet, task

• “Why would I lie to you?” I don’t know, maybe because you’re a liar.

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  4 days ago

  contradiction, honesty, humor, i, know, liar, lie, maybe, sarcasm, why

• No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

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  4 days ago

  anything, family, humor, know, lie, parent, promise, sarcasm, seeing, well

• Not gonna lie, I just assume everyone is AI now.

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  4 days ago

  AI, assume, assumption, everyone, humor, i, just, lie, life, modern, modern life, technology

• They lie on the job descriptions, so lie on your resume.

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  4 days ago

  deception, description, honesty, humor, job, job description, lie, resume, work

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