326 Funny morning quotes

• Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today, I need to be chased through the woods by a machete-wielding maniac.

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  2 months ago

  adventure, chaotic, chaotic morning, coffee, craving, cut, exaggerated, exaggerated craving, humor, i, machete, maniac, morning, need, relief, stress, stress relief, through, today, woods

• Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

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  2 months ago

  am, call, early, early hour, hour, humor, just, mean, media, morning, phone, posts, privacy, routine, sarcasm, sharing, social, social media, wake, wake up

• People who cook breakfast before going to work are too mature for me.

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  2 months ago

  before, breakfast, cook, cooking, going, humor, mature, maturity, me, morning, morning routine, people, routine, too, work

• Current situation: lying in bed, trying to manifest breakfast.

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  2 months ago

  bed, breakfast, current, humor, laziness, lying, manifest, morning, relaxing, situation, trying

• My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

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  2 months ago

  alarm, chaos, daughter, family, household, humor, less, morning, rest, us, wake, wake up, warning

• How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

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  2 months ago

  bed, humor, i, laziness, morning, motivation, procrastination, relatable, wake, wake up, want

• I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

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  2 months ago

  am, another, caffeine, coffee, energy, humor, humor quote, i, morning, sleep, sleeping, standing, tiredness, wakefulness

• Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

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  2 months ago

  astrophysics, bed, hair, humor, i, know, looking, lot, morning, science, surprise, wake, wake up, wet, wet hair, woke

• I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”

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  2 months ago

  am, big, blasting, car, change, hate, humor, i, last, mood, morning, morning routine, music, night, person, personal, personal change, personality, routine, same, turn

• Do you ever wake up in the morning and you’re just like… no.

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  2 months ago

  ever, humor, just, laziness, mood, morning, relatable, wake, wake up

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