Commentary:
😂🐱 Proof that cats are the masterminds behind all major negotiations. They'd rather stage a hunger strike than eat subpar kibble! 🍽️🧠
240 Funny pet quotes
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your dog can stay home for the hour you’re at the grocery store or restaurant.
Commentary:
Your dog called and said they’re fine at home but requested more treats in exchange for their sanity 😂🐶🦴
The best thing about dogs is you can act like something really good just happened, and they’ll instantly start celebrating too. They have no idea what the context is; they’re just always ready to party, no matter what.
Commentary:
When your dog is the ultimate hype buddy and thinks every day is a surprise birthday party! 🎉🐶🎈
Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome because it will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like, look at this dude, I bloody love this guy.
Commentary:
When you're high and your cat struts in like the CEO of the apartment 😂🐱 "Oh hai, Mr. Whiskers, what's the stock report?!" 📈😹
Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.
Commentary:
Well, looks like I need a loan because my cat just hired a lawyer 😂🐱💸
Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.
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Ready to crack the case of the midnight munchies with my trusty sidekick, Scooby-Doo! 🐾🔦🔍
My cat just sneezed a bunch of times in a row and then hissed at himself. What an icon!
Commentary:
When your cat is so extra, even his sneezes have a plot twist! 😹😜💨
“Babe” is an insane name; please refer to me as Supreme Leader.
Commentary:
Sure thing, Supreme Leader, just don't send me to the dungeons for forgetting!
If I was a stray cat, I’d follow you home and let you domesticate me.
Commentary:
Be honest, you’d have me microchipped and spoiled with treats in no time 😸🛋️
Living alone is so dumb, you’ll be asking your pets if they’ve seen your phone, and those lazy bastards never know.
Commentary:
Sounds like it's time to train my dog to be a private detective! 🕵️♂️🐶📱