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Funny picked quotes

Trending Funny Picked Quotes 🔥

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.
Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.
I find it hard to believe I used to just answer my phone when it rang. No caller ID. No idea who was calling. Just picked it up and said “hello” like a goddam daredevil.
The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.
Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

New funny picked quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Wanted to report a YouTube video, but there is no option for “Cringe”, so I just picked “Terrorism”.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone took the term 'cringe-worthy' to a whole new level! 🤦‍♂️😂 Can we get a special category for 'Epic Fail' next time, please? 🙏🚫 #YouTubeStruggles"
5 months ago
Share →: I find it hard to believe I used to just answer my phone when it rang. No caller ID. No idea who was calling. Just picked it up and said “hello” like a goddam daredevil.

Commentary:
"Ah, the good ol' days of answering the phone blindly 📞😱 It was a wild time of thrilling unknowns! Ring, ring – cue the daredevil 'hello' 😆 Who needs caller ID when you've got nerves of steel? 🦸‍♂️💥 #BraveAnsweringSkills"
5 months ago
Share →: People are teaching their dogs how to skateboard and my dog’s chart at the vet says “must be picked up, won’t walk”.

Commentary:
Looks like your dog missed the memo on extreme sports 🐶🛹! Perhaps he's just more of a "couch-potato" kind of pup 🥔🐾! Who needs skateboards when you can get carried around like a royal canine? 👑😄
5 months ago
Share →: Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.

Commentary:
"Salad: the ultimate rejection pile turned healthy masterpiece! 🥗 Who knew that pushing food to the side could result in such leafy goodness? 😄 It's like art, but with veggies! 🎨 #SaladInnovation"
5 months ago
Share →: Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

Commentary:
"Maybe in heaven, lazy people get chauffeured around in fluffy clouds, sitting back and enjoying the scenic route 🚙☁️😇 After all, why walk when you can float? 🤔😄"
5 months ago
Share →: That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

Commentary:
Looks like that pen in the junk drawer decided to rise from its slumber like a grumpy old dragon guarding its treasure! 🐉✒️ Watch out, folks, we've got a feisty pen on the loose! Shepherd it back into the writing world with a bit of humor and a dash of ink therapy! 🖊️😅
5 months ago
Share →: The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

Commentary:
"Time to 'take out' any drama and let the bins shine tomorrow! 🗑️✨😂"