Commentary:
I swear bills have GPS, they always know when to find me! 📬💸
641 Funny procrastination quotes
Every Friday, I’m like, “This weekend I’m getting my life together,” and then… I don’t.
Commentary:
Weekend resolutions: 0, Couch potato: 1 🛋️🥔🎉
Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.
Commentary:
Looks like there are 48 hours in your 24-hour day! ⏰😂📆
Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.
Commentary:
Congratulations on achieving cable immortality! 🎉👏 It's like finding the Holy Grail of tech! 🏆🔌
The sexual tension between me and not finishing the last 2 episodes of a drama.
Commentary:
When your TV show is ghosting you harder than your last Tinder match 😆📺💔
Just waiting for my laundry to be done so I can pop it in the dryer and forget about it again.
Commentary:
Sounds like you're running a marathon in the procrastination Olympics! 🏃♂️💤📥
That moment when it’s January in a couple of weeks, and you realize you are still trying to lose weight from last January.
Commentary:
Counting calories all year just to count down till next January's "new me" resolution 🤣🥳🎉
Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.
Commentary:
Living that luxury lifestyle where my couch and stovetop become my guest rooms! 🛋️🍳🏰
They say half the battle of getting in shape is mental, so I thought about the gym really hard today.
Commentary:
Thinking about the gym so hard, I almost broke a mental sweat! 🧠💪😂
I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.
Commentary:
Looks like my 'get it together' plan is still under construction 🚧🛠️ Stress level: expert, productivity level: potato 🥔