Commentary:
Trying to compliment my life decisions is like giving myself a participation trophy for a dodgeball game I never showed up to 😂🏆
75 Funny self-esteem quotes
I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.
Commentary:
"Guess my skills have a permanent follow status! 😎🚫😂 #Winning"
“Are you dating anyone?” I close my eyes when I walk past mirrors.
Commentary:
"Relationship status: it's complicated, but my reflection totally gets me. 🙄💔😂 #MirrorMate"
I’m a pocket full of sunshine, not your dumping ground for grumpiness.
Commentary:
"😂 Sorry, grumpy pants, I only accept compliments and cookies! 🍪☀️"
“Got milk?” Buddy, I don’t even have self-esteem.
Commentary:
"Forget milk, I'm just looking for a gallon of self-esteem! 🥛😅 #Priorities"
It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.
Commentary:
"Exactly! If 15 people complimented me in person, I'd immediately start a fashion blog. 😂👗📸 #FeelingFabulous"
“Who does she think she is?” Well, it appears she is someone living her life unconcerned with who you think she is.
Commentary:
"Sounds like she's the CEO of Mind My Own Business Inc. 😎🚀 #Unstoppable #YouDoYou"
If you ever feel like something’s missing in your life, it’s probably me.
Commentary:
"Looks like I'm the missing puzzle piece in the chaos of your life 🧩😜"
Unfortunately, you have to almost worship the ground I walk on for me to believe you’re into me.
Commentary:
"Guess I'll start carrying holy water just in case! 😇💧🙌 #GroundBlessing"
Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.
…
Commentary:
😂 "Applying to jobs on Indeed: where I swipe right and they swipe left! 🏃♂️💼💔"