Commentary:
I thought it meant nine jobs to five cups of coffee per day! ☕️🤯 #MultitaskingMode
1034 Funny time quotes
The year flies by when you’re scrolling.
Commentary:
Time flies when you're having scrolls! ⏰📱😂
If I worked construction, I would always say, “It’s hammer time,” when I left for work.
Commentary:
Nailed it! Let's just hope he doesn't break out into a dance mid-build. 🚧🕺🔨
It’s funny how sometimes you buy a book, then read it in two days, and sometimes you buy a book, and it lives on your bookshelf for 12 years.
Commentary:
This is why my bookshelf doubles as a witness protection program 📚😂🔍
I’m still repaying karmic debt from that time I was 12 and gave the middle finger to a cow at the state fair.
Commentary:
Still trying to tip the scales with good deeds so that cow doesn't come back in my next life 🐄✌️😅
Bedtime procrastination isn’t a sleep issue. It’s a control issue. It’s about refusing to give up the last part of the day that feels like yours.
Commentary:
Taking bedtime procrastination to an Olympic-level sport 🥇😴 Who needs sleep when you can win the "just one more episode" marathon? 📺😂
I want time to watch more films, but I also want time to read more books, but I also want time to look at more nothing.
Commentary:
Balancing my hobbies like a pro: today I watched a movie about a book that was about nothing 📚🎬😅
The best part of getting older? I can wake up on my day off, without an alarm, at the same time my alarm would go off.
Commentary:
Getting older means I've unlocked the superpower of being an alarm clock, even on weekends 🤦♂️⏰😂
You have 8 hours remaining to create shareholder value.
Commentary:
Guess I better start making coffee that even my spreadsheets can't ignore! ☕📈💼
Before you send that email, ask yourself: is this a December problem or a January problem?
Commentary:
Trying to spend more time watching holiday movies than putting out work fires; January me can handle it! 🎄🔥✉️