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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

One thing I have noticed about getting older is having to stop for a short nap halfway through scrolling down to my year of birth when completing online forms.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Lego bricks are classic educational toys. You step on them once and you can do ballet.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I just saw someone on TikTok say that the reason the world didn’t end in 2012 is because Psy turned the Honmoon gold with Gangnam Style.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Befuddlingly, a palm tree won’t fit in your hand.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Well, at least my cat is supportive of me doing less and laying around more.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Due to inflation and tariffs, my love now costs a thing.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

“Well, at least tomorrow is Friday.” -Me, having a bad Wednesday that’s about to get even worse.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

4 minutes ago

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The sexual tension between me and disappearing without an explanation.

Making waves on Reddit:

Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s all that happens in small towns.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Mirror, mirror on the wall, why so many fingerprints?

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The sound of rain outside when you’re in bed is elite.

Trending via Facebook:

Oh, lord. I brought my mouth with me to work today and it’s all sass. Prayers, please.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Starting a new show sucks. Who are these people?

I set my alarms extra early to make sure I have enough time to lay in bed and be angry about having to wake up.

6 months ago

I set my alarms extra early to make sure I have enough time to lay in bed and be angry about having to wake up.

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Commentary:
Ah, the art of mastering the art of waking up grumpy 🌞😠 Setting multiple alarms for that morning rage session – now that's dedication! Who needs sunshine and chirping birds when you have the soothing sound of snooze buttons? 😂 #MorningsAreHard

alarm, angry, bed, early, enough, extra, having, humor, i, lay, management, morning, morning routine, procrastination, routine, set, sure, time, time management, wake, wake up

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

4 minutes ago

3,416

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Can I be speaker? I’m pretty good at saying a lot without saying anything at all.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

I told my GPS I needed direction in life, and now it insists on recalculating every hour.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

When I tell you “I’m open to feedback” I’m telling you to be nice to me or I’ll resort to violence.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

No one is excited to see me in shorts except mosquitoes.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

Sleep when the baby sleeps, eat when the baby eats, work when the baby works.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Did I eat too much candy today? My stomach says yes, but my heart says no.

Going viral on Slack:

Debugging is like being the detective in a crime where you are also the murderer. Following the clues of an idiot.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

Just landed via Pinterest:

I hate it when you ask what you thought was a simple question in a meeting at work, and it turns into another meeting.

Making waves on Instagram:

In the 90s, you could tell who won the rap battle by who was still alive.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

My mom always used to tell me that I look cute when I sleep. My boss has a different opinion.

Spotted on Threads:

Talents: eating!

Going viral on X:

Women are able to leave the country unexpectedly at any time with the contents of their handbag.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Stirring up shit at the wedding by going up to random people and saying “I think it’s so brave that you’re here”.

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