Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

Touched a tree and accidentally absorbed 400 years of wisdom and 2 squirrel secrets.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

No plans and no pants kind of day.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

True luxury is sleeping until you wake up by yourself.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Whoever named rice cakes is probably also responsible for Paris, Texas.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

If I say “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared research, data, charts and I will totally prove you wrong.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Why is the Formula 1 so afraid of rain? Just drive with more caution. That’s what I always do when it rains.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,532

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Discord:

Ugh, he wants to go hiking as a first date, just like Hitler.

Shared recently on Threads:

Amazing if accurate: bleeding money.

Freshly posted on X:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Just got diagnosed with needing a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.

Making waves on Messenger:

Not to sound like a potted plant, but sunlight and fresh air really make a difference.

Going viral on Threads:

Wi-Fi: Your internet connection is unstable. Me: You should see my life.

Live now on Instagram:

I love my bodyguard. I would take a bullet for him.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

Seen just now on WeChat:

One time, when I was a kid, I fell off my bike and hit my head so hard, I was briefly able to communicate with bees.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Seeing a BBL in real life is a reality-altering experience.

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Who needs a six-pack when you’ve got a cooler full of snacks? 🍕🏖️😎

beach, body, casual, confidence, humor, self-deprecating, summer, vacation

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Can I get back all those naps I refused to take as a kid? I could really use them now.

0

2 months ago

back, childhood, humor, i, kid, naps, nostalgia, relaxation, rest, sleep, take
When things get hot, they expand, so I’m just getting warmer, not gaining weight.

0

2 months ago

expand, fitness, gaining, getting, hot, humor, just, perspective, self-acceptance, things, warm, weight
Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

0

2 months ago

creativity, drug, drugs, game, good, humor, jokes, just, name, naming, oh, prescription, prescription drug, pretty, random, randomness, Scrabble, sounds, sure, word, word game
My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, coping, health, humor, me, mental, mental health, overwhelmed, point, self-care, stress
Anybody else not stopped farting this evening? Asking for a friend.

0

2 months ago

asking, conversation, evening, fart, friend, humor, joking, social
Procrastination isn’t a horrible thing. I mean, you always have something to do tomorrow… plus you have nothing to do today.

0

2 months ago

always, delay, horrible, humor, i, laziness, management, mean, nothing, plus, procrastination, productivity, something, thing, time, time management, today, tomorrow

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on WhatsApp this month:

94 shares on Facebook this month:

If I like cleaning? Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

98 shares on Facebook this month:

They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.

45 shares on YouTube this month:

Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether you’re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

59 shares on Slack this month:

Whoever allowed me to become an adult needs to be fired.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m going to die from jealousy one day.

79 shares on Instagram this month:

Handshakes should be banned. Touch our naked body parts together for all the world to see? Gross!

62 shares on Facebook this month:

If I shook my head at every stupid thing I saw, I’d have permanent whiplash.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in a different realm.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

You can tell a group isn’t gonna make it big just by their name.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I’m a good listener. If you’re interesting.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

“I’d love to go to the moon” I said “but on a full moon day of course, no point going all that way when only half of it’s there”

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I really thought adulthood would be 50% freedom and 50% fun. Turns out it’s 100% bills.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Stop avoiding your banking app. Go look at what you’ve done.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Y’all are single because y’all are looking for 90’s love in this sick generation.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Remember when Mustangs were muscle cars and not an embarrassment to the name.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

The worst person you know is studying psychology.

Making waves on TikTok:

The feminine urge to say “ouch” when I bump into things that doesn’t even hurt.

Shared recently on Reddit:

That gap between Christmas and New Year’s when you can’t tell what day of the week it is.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Going viral on Reddit:

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

Shared recently on Facebook:

Unfortunately, I don’t give ugly men a chance, because they wouldn’t give me one if I were the ugly one.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

Just landed via Pinterest:

When I say I love the ocean, I mean I love the surface. Whatever goes on beneath has my respect, but it’s none of my business.

Spotted on Reddit:

The only downside to dating hot men is that when it ends, he’s still hot.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Can I get back all those naps I refused to take as a kid? I could really use them now.

When things get hot, they expand, so I’m just getting warmer, not gaining weight.

Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

Anybody else not stopped farting this evening? Asking for a friend.

Procrastination isn’t a horrible thing. I mean, you always have something to do tomorrow… plus you have nothing to do today.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨