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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Saw a big spider crawl into my closet last night. He’s probably in there trying on all my clothes, acting like he’s me.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

My boss told me to show initiative, so I decided to finish work early.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Watching a movie and subtitles not syncing is low-key pain.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

It took me 5 minutes to do something I’ve been stressing about for 6 months. I will learn nothing from this.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Today marks a five year anniversary of how I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Body by sandwich.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

My wheelchair keeps making a screaming noise when I run over people.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,579

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Reddit:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Breaking via Snapchat:

The season is back when women are 80% scarf.

Spotted on YouTube:

There is always enough for the needy, there is never enough for the greedy.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I worry a lot about the wild animals in my neighborhood, but I’m beginning to think they don’t worry about me.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Not gonna lie, to this day, I don’t know the difference between gray and grey, I just wing it.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

Making waves on Instagram:

Umbrellas are great if you only want to get wet sideways.

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who knew a career in donations could be so… *dissection*ary? 🩺😂 #OrganDonorGoals"

bravery, charity, donation, donor, guts, health, humor, organ, organ donor

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

4 months ago

able, anger, being, drama, flip, flip phone, frustration, humor, miss, nostalgia, phone, shut
I’m here by unpopular demand.

1 month ago

arrival, demand, here, humor, self-deprecation, unpopular, wit
For my future, I wish for another planet and a ticket to get there.

1 month ago

adventure, another, future, humor, i, planet, ticket, travel, wish
“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

1 month ago

being, budget, complaint, cost, dollars, everything, expense, frustration, getting, heat, money, temperature, tired, weather
Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

1 month ago

apple, apples, bad, blueberry, delicious, disgusting, Doritos, every, food, food humor, fruit, great, humor, inconsistency, know, problem, same, snack, sometimes, taste, time
In the event of a water landing, place the life jacket over your head and swipe your credit card to inflate.

1 month ago

airplane, airplane safety, card, credit, credit card, emergency, event, head, humor, inflate, jacket, joke, landing, life, life jacket, over, place, safety, swipe, water, water landing

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Nothing makes me feel more powerful than when I write ‘furthermore’ in an email.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Calling the police when someone unfollows.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

As someone who was born in August, I find the word leotard extremely offensive.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Ironically people who are good at giving advice find it difficult to follow their own.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

Breaking via X:

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Shared recently on Threads:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

Going bananas on WeChat:

I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Somewhere on our planet, there is someone who doesn’t care about you at this moment. It could be billions.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on the bus do not go round and round.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

I’m here by unpopular demand.

For my future, I wish for another planet and a ticket to get there.

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

In the event of a water landing, place the life jacket over your head and swipe your credit card to inflate.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Nowadays, people no longer look for a needle in a haystack, but for errors in a spreadsheet.

Don’t talk to me about regrets if you’ve never had someone’s name tattooed on you.

The sexual tension between me and vanishing without context is insane.

I’m having a bad day. Please send super-cute pics of your credit cards to cheer me up.

“I’m going to try underthinking about a situation, and see if that works.”

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I speak my mind, cause it hurts when I bite my tongue.

Who needs therapy when you can just cry in a fast-food parking lot.

I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want a joint bank account, but I ain’t had it yet.

Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.

Every time I ask my husband to bring me something out of my purse, without a doubt, he’ll bring me my whole purse. Why are purses so scary to men, lol.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Do people still actually eat 3 meals a day, or do we all just survive off of stress and iced coffee?

You want to go out in the sun and then you can’t get the couch through the door.

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

You don’t have to be crazy to be friends with me. I also train people.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Just because I can’t sing doesn’t mean I won’t sing.

20s: LOL! 30s: OMG! 40s: WTF!

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

The nicest thing I’ve done for a date is turn up.

I hate being in that mood where nothing’s really wrong but nothing feels right either.

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It takes guts to be an organ donor.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

I’m here by unpopular demand.

For my future, I wish for another planet and a ticket to get there.

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

In the event of a water landing, place the life jacket over your head and swipe your credit card to inflate.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏