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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

(lost in the labyrinth and I’m wearing a Fitbit) Nice, got my 10,000 steps.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

I don’t know what i’m going to be for Halloween, so I’m probably just going to put in a tampon and go as a sexy kite.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I don’t like this new trend of old people wearing shirts of bands I listened to when I was a kid.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

Sorry I’m late, I was fighting for my right to party.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

To anybody who thinks being self-employed means you don’t have to work for a boss you hate, I have terrible news.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,295

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

When life gives you lemons, give them back and ask what the crap is all about.

Making waves on Reddit:

For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

Trending via Telegram:

Anyone know if we got the meek inheriting the Earth today?

Making waves on TikTok:

I autograph every hotel Bible I find with “Best wishes, JC”.

Breaking via Messenger:

Can anyone recommend some basic intrusive thoughts for someone looking to get into anxiety?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m tired of being an adult. Therefore, I will be stepping down. Thank you!

Just shared via WeChat:

Mayor of a small town is such a wild job. It’s like being the president of a country where you went to high school with the whole population.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Wish I could step out of my body and take my own damn pictures.

Just landed via Telegram:

For someone who is afraid of failure, I’m very unmotivated.

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

3 weeks ago

Playful quote about weekend aftermath, humorously suggesting vitamins won't fix the hangover.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who needs a week to recover from it all? 🙈😂 #VitaminsCanOnlyDoSoMuch"

after, bathroom, bathroom mirror, girl, hangover, help, humor, mirror, morning, morning after, party, party weekend, self-care, vitamins, weekend

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on YouTube this month:

Don’t compare yourself with others. Everyone is better than you.

11 shares on Discord this month:

I’m convinced that if Earth explodes, all the cats will land safely on the moon, on their feet.

88 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

Can you imagine being a 7th grade girl and being able to see your crush’s bedroom during Zoom math class.

83 shares on Facebook this month:

It’s all fun and games until it’s 10 p.m., you’re all cozy in bed, and you remember you still have laundry in the washer.

60 shares on X this month:

The morning routine that takes the longest: finding the will to live.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

53 shares on Discord this month:

If you are influenced by influencers, you’re beyond retarded.

98 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m not stubborn, my way is just better than yours.

87 shares on Snapchat this month:

Me attempting to flirt: So do you like doing things?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

My only plan for this weekend is to move just enough so the people don’t think I’m dead.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

I wish I had a pair of skinny genes.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Airports are so funny. Like, “Oh, you’re flying across the country? Would you like to hang out in a mall first?”

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

That was the last cup of coffee in my life. From tomorrow I’ll be drinking straight from the pot.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m bad at being sad. Three minutes in, and I’m already making fun of my situation.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

I am losing touch with reality and I couldn’t be happier.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I am sick and tired of going to the bathroom. It’s been forty years. It should all be out by now.

Spotted on Twitch:

I’m an adult, but not the ‘makes positive life choices’ kind.

Just shared via Telegram:

I love that cats slap the shit out of everything they can’t understand.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

The most attractive thing a man can do is hitting his own head and repeating “stupid, stupid, stupid”.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Trending via Facebook:

How can vampires enjoy drinking our hot blood in the summer and other thoughts that keep me up at night.

Shared recently on Discord:

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Not right now. I’m manifesting.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Release that sexual frustration, get a burger.

Going viral on Facebook:

It’s comical when I lean back in my chair only to realize it’s a stool.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Easy there, unsaved number.

Eating Chinese takeout is never as depressing as in the movies. It usually is good.

Why aren’t we using these t-shirt cannons for burritos?

Your coworker is not hot; they’re just within 10 feet of you 40 hours a week.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Keep the laugh going 😂

Everyone who dramatically ‘quits’ social media is back in 48 hours like it was just a trial separation.

It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

Easy there, unsaved number.

Eating Chinese takeout is never as depressing as in the movies. It usually is good.

Why aren’t we using these t-shirt cannons for burritos?

Your coworker is not hot; they’re just within 10 feet of you 40 hours a week.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨