Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Fun fact: a person’s music taste can actually tell their intelligence level.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

They say dress for the job you want, so I walk around dressed like Darth Vader.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Spending money is too easy. For my bank account’s sake, I need a bridge troll to ask me three riddles before I’m allowed to buy something.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Life hack: put on an apron at home and people think you’re super busy doing important stuff even when you’re not.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Elevators frighten me. I take steps to avoid them.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

It’s funny how it’s often easier to access academic resources illegally, even when you have university library access.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Nobody calls you old more than people 2 years younger than you.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

292 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,561

Funny Quotes Topics

17,615

Funny Quotes Images

15,561

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,315

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

“Stop thinking about it.” Wow, thank you, I am cured. You should write a book.

Spotted on Telegram:

Checking Twitter now is like staring into your refrigerator to see if anything good has magically appeared.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Going viral on Telegram:

Uh oh, said somethin’ weird. Better fix it by saying something even weirder.

Trending via WeChat:

Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piñata.

Going viral on Slack:

Almost all of my bad decisions are food-related.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

You’d think a philharmonic orchestra would have at least one harmonica, but nope.

Shared recently on Discord:

There’s never a good place to clip your toenails at the library.

Making waves on Telegram:

Sunday night: Super Bowl party! Monday morning: Toilet Bowl party!

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs pots and pans when you have speed dial? 🍔📞 Let's cook up some delivery dreams instead!"

convenience, eating, eating out, favorite, food, humor, i, order, phone, pick, recipe, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m forced to conclude that not liking my posts is a you problem.

2 months ago

attitude, forced, humor, interaction, liking, media, online, online interaction, posting, posts, problem, sarcasm, self-confidence, social, social media
Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.

3 months ago

caffeine, coffee, drinking, faster, hot, humor, irony, lap, morning, spill, wake
You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

2 months ago

age, aging, getting, grocery, humor, joke, know, nostalgia, old, playlist, same, store
“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

2 months ago

cart, deserve, humor, indulgence, retail, retail therapy, self-care, sh, shopping, therapy, treat, yourself
We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

2 months ago

activity, announcement, back, fun, fun activity, love, movie, plan, putting, random, secret, surprise, tell, theater, Tuesday, unexpected, Wednesday
Watching a movie on the plane? No thanks. Watching my seatmate’s movie with no audio and not understanding what’s going on for over an hour? Yassss.

2 months ago

audio, boredom, entertainment, going, hour, humor, misunderstanding, movie, over, plane, seatmate, thanks, understanding, watching

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on Twitch this month:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

28 shares on Pinterest this month:

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

34 shares on Instagram this month:

Shorts should be half the price of pants.

97 shares on TikTok this month:

The Internet is fun because you can post about banana bread and somehow end up in a fight.

31 shares on Threads this month:

My phone charger is lying in another room. HELP.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

I’ve learned my lesson so many times that I could be a teacher.

52 shares on Telegram this month:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

44 shares on Telegram this month:

Hey (with the intention of making your fries my fries).

40 shares on Messenger this month:

You should be allowed to miss work if you’re not feeling sexy.

99 shares on WhatsApp this month:

In case any nudes of me should appear somewhere: It was very cold that day.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Facebook is like a never-ending high school reunion.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

In a previous life I may have been a carrier pigeon, in that all I ever think about is going home.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

My unemployed neighbor with an unlimited firework budget would like to wish everyone a happy 9th of July.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

If you don’t realize that you’re a werewolf, then you’re actually an unawarewolf.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I may not be the smartest or most athletic man in the world. There’s no second part to this, keep scrolling.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

British people be like “I was born in E-sex, grew up in Woke Ham, moved to Man Chest Hair, went to uni in Rotten Stall.”

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

If you’re soft, don’t come to my house, cause my kids will roast you.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

I’ve reached the age where I would rather go to a hardware store than a club.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Just got emotional imagining a worm emerging from its cocoon as a dragonfly and then got even more emotional remembering that’s not what they do.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

The most disturbing thing about waking up at 4 a.m. is realizing some people do this on purpose so they can exercise.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Why do people think it’s ok to ask why a person is single? I don’t ask why you’re unhappily married.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Spotted on Discord:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

May he drop his phone on his face while he’s texting other girls.

Going bananas on Discord:

Hi, I’m making some changes in my life. If you don’t hear from me, you are one of them.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

Trending via Reddit:

Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can’t leave.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Waking up early is cool until it starts feeling like you’ve had a long day at 10 a.m.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Snow White and the seven dwarves of the menopause; Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful, and Psycho.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’m forced to conclude that not liking my posts is a you problem.

Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.

You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

Watching a movie on the plane? No thanks. Watching my seatmate’s movie with no audio and not understanding what’s going on for over an hour? Yassss.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨