Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Twitter is evidence that insane people can be extremely entertaining from a safe distance.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

You know when you have so much to do that you just sit down and do nothing?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Might start signing off emails with ‘well, I hope you’re happy’

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Out of sheer boredom, I opened the front door and rang the doorbell. I was so happy.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

All quiet on the frontal lobe.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

People who read and research will always sound crazy to people who don’t.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Blaming the full moon for whatever unhinged decision I make tonight.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,345

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

I replaced my old flat pillow that hurt my neck with a new fat fluffy pillow that hurts my neck.

Trending via WeChat:

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

Trending via Reddit:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Life is weird and then you die.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.

Just landed via Slack:

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

Seen just now on Messenger:

“Are we still going?” … An introvert’s attempt to cancel.

Trending via Messenger:

My phone screen is brighter than my future.

My Native American name would be Smokes Cigarettes.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, it seems like you're really embracing that modern tribal vibe! 💨🚬 Let's just hope your spirit animal isn't a chain-smoking chimney! 😉 #NewAgeNative #SmokeSignalsAndTexts

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Keep the laugh going 😂

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Social Media Stars ⭐

58 shares on Discord this month:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

84 shares on Slack this month:

Men microdose bicuriousness by asking what you’d do for a million dollars.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

Every time a bird poops on my car, I eat a plate of wings on the front porch to show them what I’m capable of.

50 shares on Slack this month:

Never say never. Unless someone asks you when you want to go camping. Then the right answer is always “Never.”

93 shares on X this month:

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

14 shares on Facebook this month:

Social media is mental suicide.

11 shares on TikTok this month:

I think my boss is delusional; he keeps shaking his head and calls me Jesus Christ.

63 shares on Pinterest this month:

Grok, is this true? Grok, am I original? Grok, am I the only one? Grok, am I sexual?

26 shares on X this month:

Imagine thinking you have any clue what’s going on.

22 shares on Pinterest this month:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Eating Halloween candy and putting up my Christmas tree because nothing matters anymore.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Karma not moving fast enough for me. I would hate to handle it myself, Lord.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I have the sex drive of a potato.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I found my first grey pubic hair today, but I didn’t freak out; unlike everyone else in the Zoom meeting.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Honestly, how women are drawn in a manga is typically (though not always) a good clue for what demographic a manga series is.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

That drum solo from In the Air Tonight, but it’s me just slapping my tummy, waiting for the microwave to beep.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Apple want $3,500 for their Vision Pro. No thanks. I can look like a dork for free.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,254

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Born to screenshot everything and never look at it again.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Oh, to be a rich, beautiful woman in her big car, driving to buy overpriced groceries to stock up her breathtaking kitchen in her gorgeous house.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Might quit my job to focus on actually putting away my laundry.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

“It’s all in your head!” Correct! Unfortunately, I am also in there.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Even Hotmail is hotter than me.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Another beautiful day without using sin, tan and cos.

Shared recently on TikTok:

It’s so beautiful when two real perverts find each other.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I am on my second week of biweekly pay so today I will be showing you how to make a quesadilla out of paper towels.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

Breaking via Snapchat:

My first mistake of my life was my birth.

Just shared via Facebook:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I’d grow up to be a weird freak.

Just shared via Messenger:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

Freshly posted on Slack:

We can’t both age regress at the same time — someone’s gonna have to push me on the swingset.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

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