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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

The cost of living has gotten so high, I’m thinking about having a nap for dinner.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Due to personal reasons, I will be screaming into a pillow.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Not all angels are in heaven, me for example, I’m at work.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

What is Washington’s plan to make everything bagels less messy to eat?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I can trip over things that aren’t even there!

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

I’d be a terrible masseuse. After 5 minutes, I’d be like, “Okay, my turn.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,645

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

I came up with my passwords when I was 12, and never looked back.

Spotted on Reddit:

If I wore a mood ring, it would probably explode immediately.

Going bananas on Discord:

Adulting’s a total scam. Bills, taxes, and a laundry pile that breeds in the dark, were not in the brochure!

Just landed via X:

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

Making waves on Twitch:

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Just landed via Reddit:

God doesn’t do nearly enough smiting anymore.

Trending via YouTube:

This could have been an email. Me, while attending a wedding ceremony.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

Making waves on Threads:

Someone asked me if I had plans for the fall. It took me a moment to realize they meant “Autumn,” not the collapse of civilization.

Just landed via Threads:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

My toddler asked if we could go to the zoo today, and I said, “I can’t see that happening.” Then she literally left the room and came back with my glasses.

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My toddler asked if we could go to the zoo today, and I said, “I can’t see that happening.” Then she literally left the room and came back with my glasses.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Who needs a GPS when you've got a toddler with 20/20 vision? 😂👓🦁

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Messenger this month:

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There should be a zoo that has people from every country in it.

51 shares on Messenger this month:

Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

78 shares on Reddit this month:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

When a woman texts you three questions, you should only answer one. She will love that.

37 shares on Pinterest this month:

My kids couldn’t care less about personal hygiene unless we are running late somewhere.

29 shares on Reddit this month:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

66 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

91 shares on TikTok this month:

Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

The only thing that could heal me is a memory loss.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If I was a mythical creature, I’d be a Sighclops.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Damn, girl, are you Black Friday? Because I’m wondering what your bloody deal is.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve cooked for men I should have poisoned, so yeah, I do have self-control.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

What is the name of the course in medical school where you learn not to take your patients seriously?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,327

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Wild that we could have been foraging for berries and dying off at 33, but we chose this nonsense instead.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

My greatest joy in life is when a friend reads a book I recommend. My greatest frustration in life is when they don’t read it fast enough.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

An entire generation is currently studying for jobs that will not exist.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” Yeah, well, I just analyzed it from a Marxist perspective, and it was pretty obvious.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

A selfie only a mother could like.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Dear people, who drive without music playing, what do you do with your brain?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

People who don’t like pickles are so important because they give me their pickles.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

Better to be an overthinker than an overdrinker.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Doing all of this just to die in the end! LMAO!

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

“It is what it is,” I say, not really knowing what it actually is.

Just shared via Messenger:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Trending via Discord:

Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

Seen just now on X:

I don’t need therapy. I need everyone who’s ever wronged me to suddenly feel a chill and not know why.

Just shared via Slack:

TVs are like, literally, the only thing that has gotten cheaper as I’ve gotten older.

Breaking via Instagram:

I already know how it will end. One of my children will unplug my life support to charge their phone.

Spotted on Twitch:

My life coach traded me.

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