Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

“You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

If I eat a magnet, will I become more attractive?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

It’s lowkey nothing else to do except become a better version of yourself, lol.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

We need a streaming service that’s only ads. No shows, just commercials. They pay us $15 a month.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

When someone sits in the empty seat beside you: flattered yet annoyed. When no one sits in the empty seat beside you: offended yet relieved.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Terrible economy to ask a girl what’s wrong.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

This whole week could have been an email.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Coffee ain’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat batteries.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,908

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Going viral on WeChat:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Don’t forget to overestimate your importance today.

Just shared via TikTok:

I hate when I forget to say something during an argument. Like, hey, let’s argue again, I got better material now.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I just need to get over everything that has happened to me in my entire life and then we can hang out.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

“Can you multitask?” Yes, actually I am losing my mind and chilling at the same time.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Me, with $33 left after paying bills: Let’s see how much a Land Rover costs.

Going viral on Snapchat:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Shared recently on Slack:

If you don’t realize that you’re a werewolf, then you’re actually an unawarewolf.

More funny quotes 👇

Prime Video will find the movie you were looking for and then say, “Oops, you gotta pay for it.”

0

4 days ago

digital, digital rental, entertainment, frustration, humor, looking, movie, online, online shopping, oops, pay, prime, Prime Video, rental, say, shopping, streaming, subscription, video
The best part about being married is having a permanent person to debrief with immediately after any social event.

0

4 days ago

after, being, best, communication, debrief, event, having, marriage, married, person, relationship, social, social event, spouse
In university, you can literally tell who had no freedom at home.

0

4 days ago

freedom, home, humor, literally, observation, student, tell, university
Do cats have a sense of causation between grooming themselves and coughing up hairballs, or do they think it’s just an annoying separate thing which just happens to them sometimes?

0

4 days ago

annoying, behavior, cat, cats, causation, coughing, grooming, hairball, humor, just, pet, pet behavior, sense, sometimes, thing, think
Dear music, thanks!

0

4 days ago

dear, gratitude, humor, music, thanks
The peace of not knowing.

0

4 days ago

calmness, humor, ignorance, irony, knowing, peace
I’ve been thinking. Is ‘fat’ short for anything? Like an old word or something?

0

4 days ago

anything, fat, humor, old, question, short, something, thinking, word
Instead of presents this year, I’m giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

0

4 days ago

everyone, excited, excitement, gift, giving, holiday, humor, opinion, present, presents, sarcasm, year
We need a slur for people that use AI.

0

4 days ago

AI, humor, language, need, people, slang, slur, technology, technology user, user
White elephant: Nothing brings people together like fighting over absolute garbage.

0

4 days ago

competition, elephant, exchange, fight, fighting, game, garbage, gift, gift exchange, holiday, holiday game, humor, nothing, over, people, together, white, white elephant

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on Telegram this month:

Liking someone romantically is actually just a humiliation ritual.

10 shares on Facebook this month:

I hate people that talk to their Apple watch. Fake Power Rangers.

18 shares on YouTube this month:

The single star on Texas’ flag is actually a review.

17 shares on Discord this month:

“We’re the only species that drinks milk after infancy, dairy is bad for you!” We’re also the only species that drinks peach mango pineapple spirulina kale smoothies, Karen. Let me eat my cheese in peace.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

23 shares on Reddit this month:

If you want to make your mother proud, make her my mother-in-law.

61 shares on X this month:

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

64 shares on WeChat this month:

Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.

47 shares on TikTok this month:

The only recipes they have online are where I’m the one who’s supposed to buy all this stuff and then make it. That’s not what I’m looking for.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

It’s a beautiful day to ignore your existing problems and create new ones.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

If your family starts fighting on Thanksgiving, go live.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

We were having tea with my mother-in-law the other day and out of the blue she said, “I’ve decided I want to be cremated.” I said, “Alright, get your coat.”

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Men be like, “You’ve been different ever since I disrespected you.”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Elevators frighten me. I take steps to avoid them.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

I like my mornings to be slow and quiet. I want the day to romance me a bit before it tries to mess me up.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk calmly to the lock. We all know that communication is the key.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

An interviewer asked me how well I can perform under pressure; I said I’m much better at Bohemian Rhapsody.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Telegram:

Kinda worried about something. Don’t know what it is yet.

Making waves on Twitch:

High school crushes were crazy because, why the hell was I running all over school just to catch a glimpse of him.

Just shared via Reddit:

Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

Freshly posted on Slack:

My first mistake of my life was my birth.

Just landed via Discord:

Trying to carry a pet to bed is like moving a dense liquid that’s annoyed by you.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Entered this world crying, and honestly, not much has changed.

Just landed via Threads:

Venmo is my favorite social media site. I love to see my boy John charge his wife for Martinis.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

Going viral on Instagram:

I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.

Activity Log ✨

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨