Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Sorry, I laughed at your bad joke. I was trying to flirt.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Some days you just feel like a hotel microwave. You’re here, but you don’t have enough power to actually do anything.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

I love men with a provider fetish.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Worst part about not buying snacks so you won’t eat snacks is not having snacks when you need a lil snack.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

“What’s your ETA?” do you ask the birds in the sky when they will arrive.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,697

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Not to brag, but I can trip over things that aren’t even there!

Just shared via Instagram:

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

Freshly posted on Threads:

As I’m moonwalking away, they didn’t even notice I had stolen a brownie.

Trending via Instagram:

Me, seeing a man proposing to a woman in public: Hey, this guy bothering you?

Breaking via Twitch:

Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

Making waves on Reddit:

Should be able to shazam the inner yearnings of my heart.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

All the stops on the bus are pointless, except the one I’m getting off at.

Just landed via YouTube:

UNO is based on luck unless I win, then it’s based on strategy, and I’m a genius.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

More funny quotes 👇

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on YouTube this month:

Having a good heart has done nothing but made me look stupid.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

67 shares on Reddit this month:

“Too much garlic”? What’s next? Too much love? Too much desire?

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying seems to be working.

14 shares on Threads this month:

True romantics have made peace with the possibility of lifelong solitude.

77 shares on Twitch this month:

If I were you, I would rather be me.

71 shares on Threads this month:

I am absolutely unstoppable, unless it’s a bit rainy.

20 shares on Reddit this month:

You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

82 shares on Instagram this month:

What I want for dinner hasn’t been invented yet.

39 shares on Twitch this month:

If it doesn’t get a like in the first two years, I delete it.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Wow, you did such a great job clicking in your little spreadsheets today. Super proud of you.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not a perfectionist. I’m more of a good-enoughist.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

What a bleak life it must be if you’ve never had a drink shoot through your nose when you laugh.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If Twitter has taught me anything, a lot of us aren’t ready for a spelling bee.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My child has entered the “Why?” stage of linguistic development, and I’ve realized I know absolutely nothing.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Started the year single. Ending the year single. Consistency is key.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

When I was a little kid, I used to think, “This little pig went to market,” meant it was going shopping!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,662

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Only after moving in together do you realize your girlfriend’s little quirks. Mine, for example, stores vegetables in the beer compartment.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

My morning coffee makes me feel like I’ve got my shit together. I don’t, but it makes me feel like I do.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I’m trying to quit making sexual innuendos but it’s so hard.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Spending 5 minutes looking up every word I want to use in a sentence to make sure I can define it in case they ask.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your dog can stay home for the hour you’re at the grocery store or restaurant.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Having siblings is so important because you learn the exact amount you can annoy someone before they try to physically kill you.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

I’ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that I’m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

Sometimes I wonder if the strangers I see when I go outside are actually the people I talk to online.

Broadcasted on X:

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Trending via TikTok:

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

Making waves on Discord:

It’s all fun and games until your jeans no longer fit.

Live now on Pinterest:

The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Avoid calls from pesky bill collectors by not paying your phone bill.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The government always waits until the last minute to prevent a shutdown, much like my approach to paying taxes.

Live now on Slack:

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Trending via Messenger:

I need a vaccine against overthinking.

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