Funny quotes bill

13 Funny bill quotes

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Well, well, well, if it isn't the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color.

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him “Just drive”.

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him “Just drive”.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

"Thanks for your payment!" Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

I've started taking a brisk walk straight after dinner and it's saving me an absolute fortune on restaurant bills.

I’ve started taking a brisk walk straight after dinner and it’s saving me an absolute fortune on restaurant bills.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Love when a doctor emails me about my “outstanding bill”. If it’s so good, why don’t you pay it?

Love when a doctor emails me about my “outstanding bill”. If it’s so good, why don’t you pay it?

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Duolingo should have an "I'm going on holiday to this place very soon" setting so it teaches you "can I have the bill" and so on instead of "the cow boils an egg".

Duolingo should have an “I’m going on holiday to this place very soon” setting so it teaches you “can I have the bill” and so on instead of “the cow boils an egg”.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025