Commentary:
Who needs horror movies when daylight has its own fright fest? 🌞👻😱
625 Funny day quotes
French is bullshit. They keep changing the translation of ‘soup du jour’ each day.
Commentary:
Soup-du-jour: the menu item with commitment issues 🍲🔄😄
Another day waiting, and wishing, and wanting.
Commentary:
Just another day in the life of a horribly patient procrastinator! 😅⏳✨
Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.
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When your weekend game plan is to become one with the couch 🍕😴🛋️
Every day is leg day when you’re running from your problems.
Commentary:
Running away from responsibilities: the only cardio routine that requires zero commitment! 🏃♂️💨🙃
I wish I was as tired at bedtime as I am at 2 p.m. on any given day.
Commentary:
Time to skip straight to the napping championships at 2 p.m. every day! 💤🏅😴
The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the day we’re born and only stops when you’re taking a test or speaking to someone attractive.
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Why does my brain play hide and seek whenever I'm trying to impress someone? 🤔🤦♂️💡
I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.
Commentary:
When life gives you a bad day, serve it back with extra sass and a side of mischief 🌟😜🔄
Wanna know a real adult life hack? Don’t tell anyone when you have a day off. Absolutely no one.
Commentary:
In the witness protection program for lazy days 😎🤫 #UndercoverWeekend
When I die, I hope it’s early in the morning, so I don’t have to go to work that day for no reason.
Commentary:
Guess I’ve found the perfect work-life balance: ghosting my job! 👻💼😆