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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Parents may forget many things, but they never forget who brought the noisy toys into the house.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

They should make a drug that recreates the feeling of having your number called earlier than expected.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

When I worked as a restaurant critic, I wrote under a nom nom nom de plume.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

If elves make shoes, cookies, and toys, why don’t we put them in charge of more stuff?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Aging is the worst. I miss the good ol’ days when my pain was strictly emotional.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Work from home is all fun and games until you lose grip on reality.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,711

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked, I’m 4 people.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

Spotted on Messenger:

It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.

Freshly posted on X:

Sunrises are really beautiful, but the timing is rather bad.

Shared recently on Instagram:

People be like, “I’m a work in progress” and never make any progress.

Live now on Snapchat:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Freshly posted on Instagram:

In contrast to the ship, the movie Titanic was quite well received in America.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Sounds like you are suffering from a lack of vitamin Me.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

Home » Funny Nurse Quotes

Funny nurse quotes

Funny nurse quotes bring a dose of laughter to the hectic hospital halls 🏥😄 Whether you’re a seasoned RN or just love clever healthcare humor, these witty sayings capture the chaos and charm of nursing life 💉😂 Get ready to smile, relate, and share some lighthearted moments with the heroes in scrubs! 👩‍⚕️💙 #NurseLife #HealthcareHumor

New funny nurse quotes 👇

All funny nurse quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on TikTok this month:

It should be socially acceptable to just face the wall at a party when you need a break from talking.

59 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Man, these end times are taking forever.

30 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

19 shares on Reddit this month:

One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

31 shares on Slack this month:

Just saw a bird run across the street if you were wondering if anyone else is wasting their gifts.

39 shares on Pinterest this month:

You know who’s gonna love you in the end? Your dog.

40 shares on WeChat this month:

You ever meet an all-male friend group that is less a group of friends than it is “one guy and his henchmen”?

66 shares on YouTube this month:

Avoid calls from pesky bill collectors by not paying your phone bill.

81 shares on Discord this month:

If I ever go missing, please print my picture on wine bottles and not on milk boxes. My friends are more likely to find me then.

25 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever said “out of sight out of mind” never lost a spider in the bedroom.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Who called it a deep freeze instead of ice-o-lation?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My ducks may not be in a row, but at least they’re having fun. Your ducks probably hate you for making them line up like that.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Some people believe the appendix is a vestigial organ, that its use has long since passed. I think it’s primordial. Its use has yet to come.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,979

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

My only goal in life is to never end up on a Netflix documentary.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Non-alcoholic beer is like a vibrator without batteries: it fills you up nicely but without the buzz…

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Kinda sucks that I actually own a skeleton but don’t get to show anyone until I die.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Technically I’m still young, but according to my back pain I’m actually 69.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

It’s so hot out here, I saw a bird blowing on a worm before he ate it.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Watching a movie and subtitles not syncing is low-key pain.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Commas are like garlic, you measure with your heart.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

I’m sorry I said “I look forward to working with you” during our wedding vows.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

At the club asking for Ibuprofen.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Sometimes the best thing about my job is that my chair turns.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Just give your kids the iPad. They’re the ones who’ll be fighting cyborgs in the future.

Trending via Threads:

My family passed down mood swings and anxiety instead of money or houses.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

Going viral on Snapchat:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

Making waves on WeChat:

Why spend like $300 Dollars on a pair of shoes? Do you know how many chicken nuggets you can buy with that money?

Just shared via TikTok:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

Just shared via Discord:

When I’m president, everyone who listens to techno, house or rap will be allowed to drive a little faster than others.

Live now on WeChat:

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

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