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Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Sex makes you happy. So I understand your dissatisfaction.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Me pulling into a full parking lot: Don’t these people have homes?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

“Get a life!” Have you seen some of the lives out there?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

My favorite part of leaving the house is looking forward to going home.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Professor, set the time machine for right now. I’m trying to be more present.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

You are my favorite dirty thought.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Currently into monogamous friendships. If you have other friends, please don’t talk to me, it hurts my heart.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2333 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,495

Funny Quotes Topics

15,196

Funny Quotes Images

12,495

Updated

10 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

I like my money where I can see it: hanging in my closet.

Broadcasted on Slack:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

A big part of my wife’s cardio routine is rolling away from me in bed.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Together, I can beat schizophrenia.

Just shared via Twitch:

I’ve been blocked by better.

Shared recently on Facebook:

A true friend is someone who thinks you’re a good egg, even though they know you’re slightly cracked.

Reported on Telegram:

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Some people exercise every day. Right now, I’m watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell on the floor.

Just landed via YouTube:

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Blink if you want me!

Home » Funny Relaxation Quotes » Page 4

249 Funny relaxation quotes

More funny relaxation quotes 👇

1 week ago
Share →: I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

Commentary:
Sounds like the perfect introvert's dream: BYOB (Be Your Own Bartender)! 🍹🎶🏠🤣
1 week ago
Share →: “I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

Commentary:
Ah, the best kind of mental health break: cold air and zero thinking required! 🆒❄️😎
1 week ago
Share →: I read somewhere that playing white noise helps you sleep better, but I didn’t find country music helpful at all.

Commentary:
Who knew that white noise isn't code for a country music concert? 😴🎸🚜
1 week ago
Share →: I accidentally relaxed too much, and now I don’t have enough anxiety to get stuff done.

Commentary:
When you hit the snooze button on stress 😂🛌💤
1 week ago
Share →: Life sucks a lot less when your feet are in a creek, and you forgot your phone in the truck.

Commentary:
Feeling like water therapy is cheaper than tech rehab! 💧🚫📱
1 week ago
Share →: I wait all week for the weekend just to aggressively do nothing in five different outfits.

Commentary:
Sounds like my weekend agenda is fashionably on point: mastering the art of 'couch couture'! 😎👗🛋️
2 weeks ago
Share →: Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

Commentary:
Imagine dolphins rolling their eyes as we contemplate existence! 🌊🐬🤔
2 weeks ago
Share →: Rest here, weary doom-scroller, you’ve seen enough bullshit for one day.

Commentary:
Doom-scroller achievement unlocked: Level 2024 complete! Time to recharge your sarcasm meter. 😎📱🔋
2 weeks ago
Share →: If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.

Commentary:
🌊🤿 "Forget the drama, I'm just here for synchronized swimming and mermaid auditions. Who's got the glitter tails?" 🧜✨
2 weeks ago
Share →: Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).

Commentary:
Sounds like a cozy summer transformation! Who needs a tan when you can have a comforter tan? 🛌📚☕️#RotGirlSummer

For even more funny relaxation quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny relaxation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

Whenever І wake up and see that someone has wrіtten a bunch of funny posts before noon, І assume they are a mornіng drіnker.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I really admire the suns ability to be exactly where my car’s visor can’t block it out.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

Mercury is no longer in retrograde, so never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If a girl sends you selfies and you don’t compliment her, she should be allowed to electrocute you.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Yes, money alone does not make you happy. It has to be yours too.

Just shared via Instagram:

Normalize mouthing the lyrics to the song in your headphones in public.

Going viral on Slack:

My only plan for this weekend is to move just enough so the people don’t think I’m dead.

Going viral on Facebook:

The sexual tension between me and buying more books.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

Making waves on Instagram:

Let’s all stand up against iron deficiency (but not too fast).

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

249 Funny relaxation quotes

More funny relaxation quotes 👇

For even more funny relaxation quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny relaxation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

If you get injured playing peekaboo, you end up in the ICU.

To whoever has my voodoo doll, please stop making her go to work.

“You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I was blinded by a goddamn deer with a shiny red nose… No, officer, I haven’t been drinking.

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

If you’re 20, please stop saying you’re tired. I have bananas older than you.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”

Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

I hate being responsible for my own meals because I’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day.

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

New email opener just dropped: “I am interested in bothering you!”

Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money.

I used to eat my feelings but now it’s so expensive, I might as well go to therapy.

Relationship so bad you start relating to Taylor Swift songs.

Sane is boring.

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