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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Why do parents bust in your room like they trying to catch you cheating on them with another pair of parents or something?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Men are very good at being women lately.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

I feel bad for Slash. He bought a goofy hat in like 1986 and now he has to wear it until the day he dies.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

I’m not drinking 2% milk until we figure out what the other 98% is.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

I think we all know who to blame for the generation of parents who put too many Ys in their kids’ names. Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I’m upstairs and the food is downstairs. Send help.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Dec 27, 2025

4,040

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Slack:

Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.

Spotted on Reddit:

Was complaining to my mom about my daughter’s attitude and she told me I should’ve named her payback.

Making waves on Twitch:

Sober in a taxi: Please. Stop talking to me. Drunk in a taxi: … And that, Mick, is why I’m emotionally unavailable, I suppose.

Breaking via TikTok:

Stop telling everyone I’m posting from earth. People don’t need to know where I live.

Making waves on WeChat:

Whoever named the meatball absolutely nailed it.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Don’t talk to me unless you are a ham sandwich.

Trending via Facebook:

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

Going viral on Facebook:

Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

Making waves on WeChat:

Bro, you’re fine. You just need an impossible sequence of events to play out in perfect order against all odds and you’ll be fine.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Home » Funny Rules Quotes

21 Funny rules quotes

Funny rules quotes bring a hilarious twist to life’s must-dos and don’ts 🤪📜 Whether you’re breaking boring routines or just need a good laugh 😂, these witty gems remind us that sometimes rules are made to be bent (or totally ignored!) 😎✨ Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe rethink those so-called “serious” guidelines! 🎉🤣

New funny rules quotes 👇

You can make a salad without lettuce if you want, there are no rules.

0

2 months ago

cooking, creativity, food, humor, kitchen, lettuce, rule-breaking, rules, salad, want
Missed garbage day today, if you’re looking for a bad boy that doesn’t play by the rules.

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2 months ago

bad, bad boy, boy, day, garbage, garbage day, humor, looking, management, mischief, missed, play, rebellious, rules, today, waste, waste management
It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

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2 months ago

attitude, freedom, Friday, fun, humor, relaxation, rules, weekend
I’m addicted to following the rules I made up. And also breaking the rules I made up.

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2 months ago

addicted, breaker, breaking, following, humor, i, irony, maker, rebellious, rule, rule breaker, rule maker, rules, self-awareness
You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

0

2 months ago

allowed, driving, enjoyment, fun, good, humor, music, playing, rules, should, speed
My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

0

2 months ago

contradiction, expectations, household, humor, mom, parenting, rules, towel
The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

0

2 months ago

dinner, family, humor, independence, leave, number, own, rule, rules, take, terms, Thanksgiving, vehicle
Got kicked out of reincarnation club for yelling yolo.

0

2 months ago

afterlife, club, humor, life, rebellion, reincarnation, rules, yelling, yolo
Drive as I say, not as I drive.

0

2 months ago

advice, drive, driving, humor, i, irony, rules, say
I only obey the traffic rules to get on other peoples’ nerves.

0

2 months ago

annoyance, behavior, humor, i, nerf, obey, rule, rules, traffic, traffic rule

For even more funny rules quotes, hit next 👇

All funny rules quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

44 shares on TikTok this month:

My fridge has brought more light into my life than most people.

71 shares on Facebook this month:

I need someone to peer pressure me into doing things.

16 shares on Discord this month:

Monday holds the record for being the worst day of the week.

97 shares on Threads this month:

During childbirth, women are in so much pain that it is almost possible for them to feel what men have to endure when they have a cold.

20 shares on Snapchat this month:

If I were god, I would’ve rested all 7 days.

68 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m 6 donuts away from being the elephant in the room.

55 shares on X this month:

My couch better stop looking at me like that, it knows exactly what it’s doing.

39 shares on Discord this month:

The cost of living has gotten so high, I’m thinking about having a nap for dinner.

13 shares on Pinterest this month:

One does not simply become a master of karate. First, you must accidentally walk into a spider web.

43 shares on Facebook this month:

If we start dating now, we could be feeding each other deviled eggs on Thanksgiving, and breaking up before we have to exchange gifts for Christmas.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody says, ‘Bless you,’ when you fart.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

As parents we have to make sacrifices all the time. Today, I had to eat my kid’s ice cream because she couldn’t finish it.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so unfair that saying “xd” is still socially acceptable, but only if you’re speaking Spanish.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Home is where you trust the toilet seat.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d rather throw everything I own in the trash than try to deal with people on Facebook Marketplace.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sick of blessings in disguise. I am ready for a blessing with absolutely no disguise whatsoever.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Thunder is fake. It doesn’t even sync up properly with lightning. There’s some guy who waits till he sees lightning and then he presses the thunder button.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

People who remember to drink water, what’s that like?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,798

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

If you’re curious what the priciest item in a store is just bring a kid along because they’ll definitely find then break it.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Going ballistic. Anyone need anything?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

My mother told me there is a girl for me in every corner of the earth, but unfortunately the earth is round.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I wonder if BBQ thinks about me too.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

“You’re like if 9 a.m. on a Monday was a person.”

Shared recently on Messenger:

Hear me out: agenda reveal parties for people we don’t trust.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

Going bananas on Messenger:

The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

Making waves on Telegram:

The key to a healthy relationship is taking turns being the sad one.

Just shared via Slack:

You sound smart. You some kinda ‘ologist?

Trending via YouTube:

Any time I have ever uttered the phrase “no worries” I have been lying. There are many worries.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The only person I ever call is my wife, and that’s just when we’re trying to find her phone.

Shared recently on Messenger:

One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you have a favorite stove burner.

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