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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

We should put a tariff on being mean to me.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Super excited about a brand new year full of questionable life choices.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

The folks who write fragrance commercials must be like “I had the weirdest dream, Imma put it on TV.”

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

If you compliment me, my glasses fog up.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

World domination? I don’t even want to be responsible for myself.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Amazon’s checkout needs a breathalyzer feature which cancels your order if you’ve been clearly drunk-shopping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

Updated

35 minutes ago

Users Online

3,431

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

The one thing I’ve never had in my car’s glove box is a pair of gloves.

Just landed via Telegram:

Work meetings would be a lot more fun if they took place in a giant IKEA ball pit.

Going viral on TikTok:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Saturday nights are for watching zombie shows and dreaming about the apocalypse.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Does everyone have that one colleague at work who puts you in a bad mood just by looking at them?

Just shared via YouTube:

I have no desire to rekindle anything with anyone. See you never.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I asked R2D2, and he said you’re a loser.

Trending via Reddit:

TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.

Going viral on Telegram:

The lion can’t keep living like this.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

Updated

35 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

It’s awesome when people honk at you for not moving when you’re letting people cross. You’re right, bro, I should just annihilate this family of four.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

20s: LOL! 30s: OMG! 40s: WTF!

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can’t sleep.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

How my weekend was? Light, dark, light, dark, Monday.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

To cut the long story short, I have spent all my money.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

My secret talent is turning any situation into a considerably more awkward one.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Who is praying on my downfall right now and can you stop?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

My soul leaving my body when the lecturer says “let’s hear from someone who hasn’t spoken yet”

Breaking via YouTube:

Everyone’s a gangster until they see a rainbow.

Seen just now on Discord:

My cat is so finicky. I finally gave up and taught him how to order Uber Eats for himself.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Went jogging and came back after five minutes because I forgot something. Forgot I’m out of shape.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I just want everyone to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

Making waves on Threads:

Yes, I make bad decisions when I’m drunk. But I wouldn’t say that the decisions I make when I’m sober are any better.

Just shared via X:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

Spotted on Messenger:

Autocorrect changed ‘are you around?’ to ‘are you aroused?’ and my buddy didn’t want to hang out today.

Reported on Reddit:

Girl talk is my favorite. You go from discussing goals to talking about shoes, to hating men, to planning a trip in six minutes.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Is the elephant in the room with us right now?

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