Commentary:
Trying for a baby: 🎉🥳🥰
Sharing too much info: 🚫🫣🙈
47 Funny telling quotes
Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.
Commentary:
Clearly, neigh-sayers have no place in this conversation. 🐴🤔
I be telling people, “I respect your decision,” and I really don’t. The decision is always something stupid, and I just don’t want to engage any further.
Commentary:
I feel you, sometimes the best reaction is a smile and a nod… followed by a facepalm 🙄🤦♂️
Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.
Commentary:
Sounds like I need a raise in divine intervention! 💸😇
Spotify Wrapped has a special talent for pulling up an artist I’ve literally never heard of and telling me I actually listen to them 2,000 times per day.
Commentary:
Just found out I listen to a band called "Who Even Are These Guys" more than I breathe! 🎧🤔😂
Ruined a Ferrari guy’s day today by telling him that I loved his Corvette.
Commentary:
Talk about car-ma! Sure hope he has GPS to navigate through the tears 😂🚗💔
I hate when I change the battery in the bathroom scale, and it starts telling the truth again.
Commentary:
Sounds like my scale is jacked into a lie detector… 🤥🔋➡️🤭📏🚫
You know it’s bad when people start telling you that you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.
Commentary:
Looks like I've leveled up to boss mode! When did life become an extreme sport? 🏋️♂️💪🤣
My favorite part about having a Peloton is telling people I have a Peloton.
Commentary:
Sounds like owning a Peloton is great for your fitness… your social fitness! 🚴♂️😄📢
You are why Superman costumes have warning labels telling you the costume won’t make you fly.
Commentary:
Well, I guess that explains why my flight plan was more flop than soar! 🦸♂️🛑✈️