95 shares on Threads this month:

Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.

47 shares on Discord this month:

Getting a boner because the Lego instructions are telling me what to do.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

71 shares on Facebook this month:

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

40 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Insomniacs who are not afraid of the dark have nighty-night problems but the pitch ain’t one.

93 shares on Telegram this month:

“Dating pool” is incredibly optimistic. More like dating drainage.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Reverse cowgirl, so we can both address the elephant in the room.

13 shares on Pinterest this month:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

People who play golf don’t concern me nearly as much as the people who watch it.