Commentary:
I totally get it! Those hand dryers are more skeptical of my existence than my cat when I try to feed her something new. 🙆♂️🌀🐱
90 Funny bathroom quotes
This morning, like every morning, he practiced his quick draw of his finger guns in the bathroom mirror, because you just never know.
Commentary:
"Just in case of a high-noon showdown with the reflection sheriff! 🤠🔫😆"
My showers take so long because I always hold a shower concert.
Commentary:
When I shower, I sell out every night and never give away free tickets! 🎤🚿🎶
The thing about being 50+ is that whenever an opportunity to pee is available – you’re wise to take it.
Commentary:
When you hit 50, your bladder gets a promotion: Director of Urgency! 🚽😂
The more water you drink, the more bathroom breaks, the less you work. Stay hydrated.
Commentary:
Making waves in productivity one bathroom break at a time! 🚰🚽💦
So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?
Commentary:
Taking multitasking to a whole new level! 🍰🚽🥄 How's your cookie dough coming along?
Nothing in a household is said more lovingly than, “Can you bring me some toilet paper?”
Commentary:
When you're on the throne but forgot your crown 👑🚽🤣
My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”
Commentary:
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who needs a week to recover from it all? 🙈😂 #VitaminsCanOnlyDoSoMuch"
Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?
Commentary:
"Level up your heist skills: become a Time Bandit! 🚽⏰🤣"
Told my boss I was going to the bathroom but didn’t say which one. Now I’m at home.
Commentary:
"Level of stealth: bathroom ninja! 🚽🏡😎 #HomeIsWhereTheToiletIs"