38 Funny casual quotes

• 

  3 days ago

  Share →: Washing my hands in the sink and then wiping them on my cat, like a towel.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a hand towel when you've got a purrsonal assistant? 😂🐱👐"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I love when dudes are named Guy. Like, yeah. Exactly.

  Commentary:
  "When your name is practically a job description, you're destined for greatness! 😄👨‍💼 #JustAGuyThings"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: “What’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

  Commentary:
  "Playlist diversity champion right here! 🎶🙌 If it jams, it lambs!"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Bold of me to constantly use the phrase “no worries!” when I am, in fact, constantly full of many worries.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Me pretending I have inner peace like 🍃😌🍃 #WorryLevelExpert"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Summer body? Folks, I’m cosplaying as a potato that’s seen some things.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Spuds and giggles! Who needs a beach bod when you can embody the wisdom of a well-traveled tater? 😂🥔✨"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Carefully choosing which wine to pair with a McRib.

  Commentary:
  "When you're deciding between a fine Merlot or a rare 'McRib Red' for that gourmet experience! 🍷🤔🍔"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Saturdays are for doing absolutely everything or doing absolutely nothing, everybody knows that.

  Commentary:
  "Saturdays: the ultimate 'choose your own adventure' day! 😴🏃‍♂️ Or as I call it, 'Look busy while doing nothing!' 🍕📺"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

  Commentary:
  "When you realize your true weekend uniform is pajamas and a couch! 😂🛋️✨ #LivingTheDream"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

  Commentary:
  "Sure, I'll bring the rubber ducky! 🦆🚿😂"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

  Commentary:
  "Degrees in snackology and sunbathing 101—I'm on the honor roll! ☀️🍿😂"

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