43 Funny floor quotes

• I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

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  2 months ago

  boyfriend, cleaning, floor, funny observation, home, humor, kill, mopping, observation, relationship, surprise, thought

• Are you there, bathroom walls, ceiling, floor, mirror, sink, and towels? It’s me, the kids toothpaste.

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  2 months ago

  bathroom, ceiling, daily, daily life, floor, household, humor, kids, life, me, mirror, parenting, sink, toothpaste, towel, towels, walls

• I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

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  2 months ago

  believe, disbelief, find it funny, floor, hard, hard to believe, humor, i, laughing, rolling

• Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

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  2 months ago

  cough, drop, drops, floor, hard, humor, joke, mouth, observation, think, wordplay

• You could go camping or you could stay at home, not shower, leave dirt on the floor and let some squirrels in.

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  2 months ago

  activity, camping, convenience, dirt, floor, home, humor, leave, let, nature, outdoor, outdoor activity, shower, squirrels, stay

• I would describe my personal style as whatever is on top of the pile of clothes on the floor.

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  2 months ago

  clothes, describe, fashion, floor, humor, i, mess, personal, pile, style, top, whatever

• Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

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  2 months ago

  1, 50, activity, after, age, age humor, calling, floor, floor activity, gift, gift wrapping, gifts, help, holiday, holiday preparation, holiday spirit, humor, preparation, spirit, stand, standing, standing up, struggle, wrapping

• Life would be so much easier if you could push a button that makes dickheads fall through a trap door in the floor.

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  2 months ago

  button, dickhead, door, easier, fall, floor, frustration, humor, life, much, push, thinking, trap, trap door, wishful, wishful thinking

• My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

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  2 months ago

  around, avoidance, cleaning, cloth, cut, dirt, floor, humor, i, just, kitchen, line, procrastination, relatable, robot, same, spin, vacuum

• So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

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  2 months ago

  across, adult, adult behavior, baby, behavior, bottle, crawling, cute, floor, funny observation, humor, i, intervention, need, observation

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