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29 Funny floor quotes

Trending Funny Floor Quotes 🔥

I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.
I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”
I don’t want to adult today, I just want to dog. I’ll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks.
Life would be so much easier if you could push a button that makes dickheads fall through a trap door in the floor.
That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp, and land on the floor.

More funny floor quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: I’m now at the age where sitting cross-legged on the floor is punishable by about three days of full-body paralysis.

Commentary:
Oh, the joys of aging! 🧓 That moment when sitting cross-legged feels more like a risky yoga pose than a casual seating choice. 🧘‍♂️ The floor suddenly seems to have turned into a secret trap of full-body paralysis waiting to strike! Better grab a chair and some ice packs just in case. ❄️😆
5 months ago
Share →: Men look so amazing for people who use the same product for their teeth, hair, floor and car washing.

Commentary:
"Men are truly versatile creatures, mastering the art of multitasking with a single shampoo bottle! 🧔🧴🚗 Who knew cleaning the house and looking dashing could have so much in common? 😄🧼 #ManlyGroomingSkills"
5 months ago
Share →: My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.

Commentary:
"Trying to get off the floor after a workout be like 🐢💪 Just trying to avoid the struggle and embrace the grace 😅 #TurtleMoves"
5 months ago
Share →: Many men also have a walk-in closet. For them, it’s just called a floor.

Commentary:
"Many men also have a walk-in closet. For them, it's just called a floor. 🚶‍♂️👔 Because why bother with all those shelves and hangers when your clothes can simply enjoy a laid-back stroll across the room, right?"
5 months ago
Share →: What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Commentary:
"Who needs fancy footwork when you've got a silver tongue? 💃🗣️ Talk about a smooth operator! Just remember, it's all fun and games until someone requests the Cha-Cha Slide… 🕺😅"
5 months ago
Share →: Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

Commentary:
"Looks like your screws are really falling for you! 😄🔩 Keep an eye out for any loose nuts too, just in case they start following suit. 🤪 #DIYdrama"
5 months ago
Share →: I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.

Commentary:
"Who needs Yoga when you've mastered the art of advanced key retrieval yoga pose? 💁‍♂️🔑 Maybe Yoga just needs to up its game to impress you! 😄"
5 months ago
Share →: I don’t want to adult today, I just want to dog. I’ll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks.

Commentary:
"Who needs adulting when you can just be a carefree pup soaking up the sun and receiving snacks on demand? 🐶☀️ Don't worry, I'll bring the snacks as long as you promise belly rubs in return! #DogLifeGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

Commentary:
Looks like these savvy pups have cracked the code to getting extra treats! 🐶🤣 Who knew the "f-word" in the kitchen could lead to such tasty rewards? Time to hire them as kitchen assistants, right? 😉🍗