Funny garden quotes

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Oligarchy sounds like something you dip your breadstick in at the olive garden.

  Commentary:
  “Ah, the elusive Oligarchy sauce—the perfect pairing for your breadstick-dipping adventures at Olive Garden! Just be careful, too much Oligarchy might lead to an unexpected hierarchy of breadstick hoarders at your table! #BreadstickMonarchy”

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

  Commentary:
  Ah, her heart is like a haunted floral shop, where ghosts tend to arrangements of wilted blooms, each petal whispering tales of lost love .

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

  Commentary:
  Looks like the cat’s out of the bag… and into the garden ! Good thing your father is fluent in meow-negotiation! #NeighborhoodDrama #GardeningSkills

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: The eyes are the windows to the soul. A mustache is the front garden, and the mouth is that big pothole the council should do something about.

  Commentary:
  “Ah, the eyes shining bright like glittering windows to the soul … but oh my! That robust mustache proclaiming ‘welcome to the front garden’ … and that big pothole of a mouth crying out for some city council intervention ! A charming mix of character traits indeed! ”

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I have now spread out a blue tarpaulin in the garden. I want it to look like I have a pool on Google Maps.

  Commentary:
  “Just another day in the life of a backyard illusionist. Who needs a fancy pool when you can have a ‘Google Maps special’? #BackyardGoals”

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My outdoor flowers are doing amazing this year because I left them at the garden center where they belong.

  Commentary:
  “Oh, they’re truly thriving in their natural habitat at the garden center, soaking up all the attention and plant care they deserve Who knew the secret to perfect flowers was leaving them where they truly belong?”

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

  Commentary:
  “When life gives you a garden and a whimsical dream, why not give helicopter trapping a gleam? Wishing you all the luck in the world, may your ‘H’ stand for ‘Hover’ and not ‘Hilarious!’ ”

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I wanna stand with you on a mountain and throw you into the sea, or whatever Savage Garden was on about.

  Commentary:
  “Ah, Savage Garden – the masters of blending romance with questionable mountain etiquette! Who knew love could involve such adventurous aquatic activities? Let’s hope ‘standing on a mountain’ with someone doesn’t lead to a one-way ticket to the sea! #SavageGardenShenanigans”

For even more funny garden quotes, check out the next page, if available

All funny garden quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes