Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Talking to the stars because people suck.

Commentary:
"Who needs people when you've got the stars to talk to? 🌟😄 After all, stars are great listeners and they never suck! 💫✨ #StargazingFTW"
6 months ago
Share →: Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

Commentary:
"Who needs a crowd when you've got a family size Toblerone as your loyal companion? 🍫✨ It's time to dive into chocolatey goodness and indulge in a one-on-one sweet escape! 🍫🕺 #chocolateoverdose #TobleroneLove"
6 months ago
Share →: So single the neighborhood cats make ME dinner.

Commentary:
"Talk about being single to the point where even the neighborhood cats are trying to set you up with some home-cooked meals! 🐱🍽️ Who needs a significant other when you have a feline culinary squad on standby? 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Called myself to see if I’d answer, sent me to voicemail. Twice.

Commentary:
"Seems like even your own self is ghosting you now! 📵😂 Maybe it's time for some self-reflection on your caller ID skills. #VoicemailVoices"
6 months ago
Share →: You’re never alone. There’s mold.

Commentary:
"Who needs friends when you have mold, am I right? 🤣🍄 It will always be there to keep you company, silently judging your snack choices and flourishing in the damp corners of your life. #FungusFriendsForever"
6 months ago
Share →: Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

Commentary:
Oh, dear! Looks like someone's devices are feeling a bit drained and can't power up those creative ideas! 🤖🔋 Don't worry, we can definitely find some non-battery-operated inspiration to spark your genius instead! ⚡💡 Let's leave those tired devices to recharge while we dive into some electrifying new ventures! 🚀💥
6 months ago
Share →: I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Commentary:
"Oh, you're 'quite nice,' huh? 🤔 Sounds like a classic case of 'If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?' But hey, who needs friends when you've got such a sparkling personality, right? 😄🌟"
6 months ago
Share →: Dating over 40 is like Hide and Seek but no one is looking for you.

Commentary:
Dating over 40 is like playing an intense game of Hide and Seek, except you're the one in camouflage trying to blend in with the furniture! 🙈 Who needs a partner when you're the undisputed champion of disappearing acts? 🤣 #ExpertHider #AintNobodyGotTimeForThat
6 months ago
Share →: Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

Commentary:
"Who knew a house plant could be the ultimate hydration buddy! 🌿💧 Here's to ensuring there's always someone wilting more than you! 😂 #PlantParent"
6 months ago
Share →: Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

Commentary:
Ah, the joy of being single during the holidays. 🙃 While everyone else is busy decking the halls and roasting chestnuts over an open fire, us single folks are pros at putting on a brave face and pretending that we're totally fine spending another night alone with our Netflix queue. 🎄🎁 Just think of it as an extended opportunity to practice your solo dance moves and enjoy the entire box of chocolates without any judgment! 💃🍫 #SingleBells #