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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Running from your problems is cardio.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

If a billionaire is telling you to vote for someone, it’s probably in your best interest to vote for the other person.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

I hate texting someone something freaky at night, and they reply in the morning like it’s still the vibe. Shut up. The sun’s out. I’m pure again.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Whoever told you there’s no such thing as a stupid question lied.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Apparently, responding to a wedding invitation with “maybe next time” is wrong. I know that now.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Men love when you ask them to explain something to you. It is considered a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Anyone know how to create an Outlook rule that sends every email to junk, deletes it, blocks the sender, and sets my laptop on fire?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,397

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Parenting is cheering on your kid’s winning softball team all weekend and then cheering on the Sunday rain for cancelling the rest of the games.

Just landed via Reddit:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

Just shared via TikTok:

Sometimes, I feel like I need love, but the moment I finish eating, I realize I was just hungry.

Going viral on Slack:

Why can’t hackers just delete everyone’s bad debt, credit, and mortgages?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

Trending via Threads:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Just shared via TikTok:

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

Just landed via WeChat:

Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.

Just shared via WeChat:

So proud of my ancestors for crawling out of the sea and evolving lungs. Pretty disappointed in them ever since though.

Just landed via Threads:

Once you find humor in any situation, you have nothing to fear.

Funny miracle quotes

Funny miracle quotes bring a splash of laughter to those awe-inspiring moments when the impossible happens 🤯✨ Whether it’s a quirky twist of fate or a hilarious “how did that even work?” scenario, these witty sayings remind us that miracles don’t always have to be serious 🙃💫 Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even snort as we celebrate the lighter side of the extraordinary! 😂🌟

New funny miracle quotes 👇

All funny miracle quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Twitch this month:

I hate when people say “It could be worse” because it could be better, too.

64 shares on Threads this month:

I know it hurts like hell, and you don’t think you can do it, but it’s just one push-up.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

I used to be a night owl, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more of a person who doesn’t function at any time.

25 shares on Messenger this month:

If you say something while exhaling smoke, it is 10 times more profound.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

21 shares on Threads this month:

Some people are wise; some are otherwise.

30 shares on WeChat this month:

Handing over my ID at the post office. The clerk said, “You’ve aged quite a bit since this photo was taken.” I said, “Yes, I had it taken just before I joined this queue.”

45 shares on X this month:

I have nothing in common with people who “forget to eat”.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

17 shares on Reddit this month:

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re in her DMs. I’m accidentally reposting reels of Tibetan foxes because I don’t know how to use the app anymore.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Retiring my wallet condom after two years of active duty. 87 tours with 0 combat deployments.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

December calories don’t count. That’s the law.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I put the dance in “Good riddance!”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Manipulative birthday text to an ex idea: thank you for loving me briefly in the way that only you could.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re never too old to become less of an idiot.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Is it okay for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school, or am I just a terrible teacher?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve surpassed the need for coffee, for I have evolved into a higher state of awesome.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,723

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Job hunting has legitimately been the most demoralizing experience of my life. Nothing else will make you realize how little you can actually do.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

My card got declined at the barbershop so they put all the hair in my mouth and squeezed me until it came out of my head.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

It was all revealed to me in a delusion.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

You should never forget where you came from. That’s probably where your keys are.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Coffee ain’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat batteries.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

I’m going to need to rewatch Idiocracy to see what happens next.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

I put my music on shuffle then get mad when it doesn’t play the song I want.

Just shared via Telegram:

Why would a needle be in a haystack, anyway?

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I hope this is the year my teen learns how to turn off a light when she leaves a room.

Spotted on Twitch:

Forget tagging friends, I want to be able to tag my enemies.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Spotted on Pinterest:

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

Just landed via Instagram:

It’d be nice if my bank account filled up as quickly as my laundry basket.

Just landed via Facebook:

Nothing tests your patience like a group chat blowing up your phone.

Making waves on Pinterest:

My favorite part of my workday is when I grab my shit and leave.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I like my job, but if I had the opportunity to become a rich housewife, I would take it.

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