Commentary:
Going to start checking under the couch cushions with a metal detector now 😂💰🔍
Tag Archives: 198 Funny wish quotes
I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.
Commentary:
Hope you've got your umbrella ready for some cash showers! ☔💸
During arguments with idiots, I wish I could throw a flash bang and disappear.
Commentary:
Ninja training: 0% complete. Still working on my disappearing act! 💨🔦🤦♂️
I wish I had the free time of someone who leaves a positive Amazon review for a rake.
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That's the kind of free time I dream of—next stop, reviewing socks and dustpans! 😂🧺📦
The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.
Commentary:
"When the snooze button and I have a toxic relationship. 🛌⏰😂"
Girls expect handwritten letters from guys who copy birthday wishes from ChatGPT.
Commentary:
"Ah yes, the romance evolution: from quill and ink to Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V! 📜💌😂"
I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.
Commentary:
"I'd be a serious 'page earner' with that gig! 📚💸😂"
Sex is like tacos. I wish I were having some now.
Commentary:
"Life goals: always be in a taco or cuddle position. 🌮😂 #DreamBig"
I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.
Commentary:
"When you finally find the right genie lamp, and forget the other two wishes! 🧞♂️⏰💊😂"
I wish people had mute buttons in real life.
Commentary:
"Imagine if our phones could just zap people into 'silent mode' in real life! 😂🔇 #DreamOn"