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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

12 people have been to the moon and only 8 people have won Takeshi’s Castle. Really makes you think.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Never let your job prevent you from acting unemployed.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

In the 90s, you’d always find your way to some stranger’s house.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Turning in bad essays to professors you have a personal relationship with is the most humiliating thing ever.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

If you want to impress me with your car, it should be an ice cream van.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Does anyone else run a used match under water before disposing of it because you’re afraid it still has some fire left in it, or are you normal?

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

As a child, I had the impression that I would be offered free drugs by strangers much more frequently than the 0 times it’s happened.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

If I were lost and all I had was a compass, I would still be lost.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,390

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Twitch:

Good friends don’t let their friends do stupid things alone.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

There’s nothing like the first two months with a man when he’s still pretending to be a good person.

Shared recently on Facebook:

People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Breaking via X:

I hate liars, but what I hate more is when they think I’m an idiot and won’t find out the truth.

Going viral on TikTok:

Everyone you don’t like in your personal and professional life is a narcissist.

Spotted on Threads:

People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

I want a man to love me so bad his entire family thinks I did witchcraft on him.

3 months ago

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Commentary:
Looks like you've got the kind of charm that could start a Hogwarts enrollment! 🧙‍♀️❤️✨

bad, family, humor, i, love, magic, man, me, obsession, relationship, want, witchcraft

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love when my brain cells kiss and I have an idea.

0

2 months ago

brain, brain cell, cell, cells, creativity, humor, i, idea, kiss, love, thought
Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

0

2 months ago

ad, ads, campaign, election, humor, money, more ads, political, political ad, satire, send, us
Did you get that psychic damage I sent you?

0

2 months ago

communication, damage, humor, i, joke, psychic, sarcasm
In my culture, family is completely unimportant. And we hate food.

0

5 days ago

culture, family, food, hate, humor, sarcasm
The 10 minutes I spend on my mobile before I go to sleep are the best 3 hours of my day.

0

2 months ago

before, best, day, hours, humor, i, minutes, mobile, procrastination, relaxation, sleep, spend, time
The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

0

5 months ago

culture, holding, internet, movie, old, old movie, people, preservation, society, together, upload

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on Discord this month:

I bet whenever a pilot drives a car there’s a brief moment of panic like “why isn’t it going up?”

19 shares on Messenger this month:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

97 shares on Discord this month:

Parenting is cheering on your kid’s winning softball team all weekend and then cheering on the Sunday rain for cancelling the rest of the games.

79 shares on Reddit this month:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

71 shares on YouTube this month:

I should’ve existed as a tree.

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

90 shares on Slack this month:

“You’re under the weather?” We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

32 shares on X this month:

There are so many people going to hell. I’m thinking of investing in some property there.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

A degree in international law is about as real as a degree in Dothraki.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Are you my appendix? Cause you seem kind of useless to me.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Calling a lobotomy a “lobobo” to fit in with Gen Z.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

If buying isn’t owning, then pirating isn’t stealing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

It took me 5 minutes to do something I’ve been stressing about for 6 months. I will learn nothing from this.

Just landed via Pinterest:

If every day is a gift, today is socks.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Contrary to what we currently believe, we don’t choose afternoon naps. Afternoon naps choose us.

Going viral on Instagram:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Just landed via TikTok:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Live now on Instagram:

Gambling is all about getting something for nothing and spending thousands of dollars trying to do it.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I’m delusional but self-aware, I call that Delaware.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

Freshly posted on Discord:

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

Trending via YouTube:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I want a man to love me so bad his entire family thinks I did witchcraft on him.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I love when my brain cells kiss and I have an idea.

Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

Did you get that psychic damage I sent you?

In my culture, family is completely unimportant. And we hate food.

The 10 minutes I spend on my mobile before I go to sleep are the best 3 hours of my day.

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨