Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

More foods should have boats, why should gravy have all the fun?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

When your stomach is really mad at you, and you’re not sure which one of your 13 unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

If you innocently act like you don’t know, people will explain dirty words to you and it’s hilarious.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

I was just viciously body shamed by my mirror.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

The older I get, the more I love my morning coffee and no one speaking to me.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

An entire generation is currently studying for jobs that will not exist.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Shazam, but for the name of the person who literally just introduced themself to me.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

My Wi-Fi is stronger than my will to socialize.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Not a fan of frozen pizza. Too cold, in my opinion.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

353 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,622

Funny Quotes Topics

17,673

Funny Quotes Images

15,622

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

August is technically summer, but spiritually fall.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Going viral on X:

90% of the ocean is unexplored, which means there could be a McDonald’s down there.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Guess I’ll be getting the same thing for Christmas, again. Fat!

Seen just now on WeChat:

People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out… I mean, don’t they have thoughts?

Seen just now on Instagram:

I figured out how they built the pyramids. No internet.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

The only exercise I done last month was running out of money.

Just shared via Reddit:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

They say 30 is the new 20, and 40 the new 30. All I know is 9 p.m. is the new midnight.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

It’s crazy that things have got to a point where you can say, “Jurassic Park 3 is one of the better movies in the series.”

My bit for Thanksgiving is going to be constantly bringing up politics, but pronouncing every politician’s name slightly incorrectly.

2 months ago

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Commentary:
Getting ready to stuff myself with turkey and lots of "Joe Briden" debates 🍗😂🦃

bit, conversation, every, family, family gathering, gathering, going, holiday, humor, incorrectly, joke, mispronunciation, name, politician, politicians, politics, Thanksgiving

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Getting emotional thinking about everything SpongeBob has been through and his resilience despite it all.

2 months ago

cartoon, emotional, everything, getting, humor, perseverance, resilience, Spongebob, thinking, through
When the doorbell rings, I always go to the door with my jacket on. Depending on who it is, I either just want to leave or have just come home.

2 months ago

always, door, doorbell, funny observation, home, humor, i, jacket, just, leave, observation, rings, situation, social, social situation, visitor, want
Not just anyone can be cremated. You have to urn it.

2 months ago

cremation, death, death joke, humor, joke, just, pun, urn, wordplay
I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

3 months ago

activity, bear, chance, enjoy, humor, i, nature, outdoor, outdoor activity, risk, walk, woods
I put the mess in domestic.

2 months ago

chaos, domestic, household, humor, i, mess, put, wit
My life is based on a true story.

2 months ago

comedy, humor, irony, life, self-deprecation, story, true, true story

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on X this month:

NFTs were less about the money and more about the friends you scammed along the way.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

Airlines be like: “Oh, wow. Oh, God. We didn’t think everyone would bring a bag!”

87 shares on Threads this month:

If anything I post makes you mad, just know that it pleases me.

56 shares on WeChat this month:

I like waiters. They bring a lot to the table.

79 shares on Pinterest this month:

Watching “Dirty Dancing” as a teenager: Damn right, no one puts Baby in a corner. Watching “Dirty Dancing” as an adult: This girl is a brat and needs a lesson.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

They say money doesn’t solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine.

20 shares on Discord this month:

Does no one disappear in the Bermuda Triangle anymore, or is there just too much other news?

87 shares on Threads this month:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

I just want someone who can see through all my bullshit and hate me for who I really am.

64 shares on WeChat this month:

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

If you have children, you can experience all human emotions before 9 a.m. on Sundays.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Is there a word for FOMO but it’s already happened and you didn’t know about it when it was happening?

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

It’s all fun and games until you send the clapping emoji instead of the prayer hands when commenting on the news of a death in the family.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

What is the name of the course in medical school where you learn not to take your patients seriously?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness, clearly never paid for a divorce.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

My favorite part about summer is when I get to go back inside where it’s air conditioned.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I’m so thankful I live on the planet that has pizza.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Live now on WhatsApp:

I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”

Making waves on Threads:

If she says “it’s fine,” you’re probably in trouble.

Just shared via Twitch:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me I’m gonna say “I’m a biter” and see how it goes.

Breaking via Threads:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?

Shared recently on Facebook:

Maybe coffee is addicted to me?

Spotted on WeChat:

Can’t believe I didn’t get invited to that party I would have made up an excuse not to go to.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My bit for Thanksgiving is going to be constantly bringing up politics, but pronouncing every politician’s name slightly incorrectly.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Getting emotional thinking about everything SpongeBob has been through and his resilience despite it all.

When the doorbell rings, I always go to the door with my jacket on. Depending on who it is, I either just want to leave or have just come home.

Not just anyone can be cremated. You have to urn it.

I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

I put the mess in domestic.

My life is based on a true story.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨