Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the magical moment when siblings transform from rivals to allies in the epic battle against bedtime! 🤣🌙 Who knew sibling solidarity could be so strong when facing the dreaded lights out? #SiblingGoals"

bedtime, being, better, childhood, family, fun, laughter, nobody, play, sibling, together

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

0

3 months ago

confidence, down to earth, Earth, height, humor, just, most, people, personality, short
If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

0

2 months ago

actually, behavior, being, complain, complaint, fitness, humor, i, irony, just, out of shape, people, relatability, self-awareness, shape, tips, try, want, workout, wrong
If you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off, I will do the same thing to your head.

0

2 months ago

back, conflict, head, humor, playful, reaction, revenge, shoe, step, thing
If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

0

2 months ago

buying, humor, i, lottery, money, nice, politician, politicians, satire, sh, spending, wealth, win
If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

0

2 months ago

die, diet, eat, exercise, fit, fitness, health, humor, irony, life, lifestyle, well
I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.

0

2 months ago

break, conversation, dating, five, guy, guys, heart, heartbreak, humor, i, love, me, relationship, seriously, seriousness, take, talk, wants

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Instagram this month:

We need a slur for people that use AI.

79 shares on X this month:

Noise cancelling headphones but for when the noises are coming from inside your head.

96 shares on YouTube this month:

For a guy supposedly called my “brother,” I’ve never seen him make broth even once.

34 shares on Twitch this month:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

78 shares on X this month:

Peloton guy yelling “two more, one more” but it’s me eating Cheetos.

60 shares on Instagram this month:

I hate when people are like “you are so nice”. I’m ugly, I have no other choice.

59 shares on Threads this month:

Many of you need to put “lighten up” on your resolutions list.

91 shares on Threads this month:

Before ball parks were invented there was pretty much no way to give someone a rough estimate.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

Some people peak in high school. I peaked when I realized I never had to see them again.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Someone needs to press pause on this weekend.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Every time I want to use a big word that I just know the meaning of, I Google it first, just in case.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Few things in life are as disappointing as having to poop right after a shower.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

I’ve discovered that my visiting family members leave crumbs in the butter. Please keep me in your thoughts during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

One day you’re young and fun, and the next thing you know, you’re staring out of a window for no reason.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

“You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

Why do fish stink so much even though they bathe their whole lives?

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Onion rings? I’m answering.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

My issue with Jeopardy is that you never get the sense that the contestants are in any real danger.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

It’s jarring for me when there are British people in the Midwest. How did you get this far inland?

Trending via Messenger:

I bet my calculator app wrapped would be pretty shameful.

Spotted on Threads:

The new generation will never know what heartbreak feels like with wired headphones that have a loose connection.

Seen just now on Slack:

Therapists probably have to struggle so hard not to ask to see pictures of the people their clients are obsessing over.

Breaking via Threads:

Pleasing everyone, that’s impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!

Broadcasted on Threads:

Life can be so beautiful, you just can’t get sober.

Shared recently on Slack:

We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

Live now on Threads:

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

Spotted on Messenger:

Before I started my own business, I would suffer from anxiety on Sunday nights. But now that I run my own business, I have anxiety every night.

Shared recently on Reddit:

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

If you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off, I will do the same thing to your head.

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨