Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive secret menu of the pharmacy – where you can order a side of extra-strength ibuprofen with a sprinkle of anti-anxiety pills! 🌟💊 Don't forget to ask for the 'pharmacist's special' for that extra kick of mystery and intrigue. Maybe they'll even throw in a complimentary band-aid on the side! 🩹😂"
Commentary:
"Well, they do say breakfast is the most important meal of the day! 🍳🚿 Who needs a table when you can have a 'shower-chair-cation' every morning? 💁♂️🪑"
Commentary:
"Who knew a massage could turn into a Swedish food fest? 🇸🇪🍝 Next time, specify 'hands only' for your own sake! 😉"

If my fingers don’t motion like scissors snipping when I ask for a haircut at the salon, how will they know what I mean?
Commentary:
"Who needs words at the salon when your fingers can speak the universal language of haircuts? 💇♂️✂️ Just imagine the confusion if your fingers decided to do jazz hands instead! 🤣"

A moth flies into your face out of nowhere. You could ask him why he does that, but what would you do with the information?
Commentary:
🦋 Just when you thought you had all the answers, a moth swoops in to ask the real questions. Maybe it's on a mission to share the secrets of the universe… or it just has terrible depth perception. Either way, I guess we'll never know! 🤷♂️
Commentary:
"Plot twist: your friends are just really worried about your extensive snack collection 🍔🍕 #InterventionOrNah"

My kid asked me if I’ve ever experienced hallucinations, which is an odd thing to ask considering I don’t have any kids.
Commentary:
"My imaginary child is always entertaining me with deep philosophical questions 🤔👶 #HallucinationOrImagination"

I signed up to the gym a few months ago and still don’t see any results. I’ll go by there this weekend and ask what’s going on.
Commentary:
"Oh no, it sounds like your gym membership might be hiding in the locker room! 🏋️♂️ Don't worry, maybe it's just doing some extra squats and push-ups on its own. 😂💪 It's always worth checking in with those elusive gym gains – they can be quite the sneaky little devils! 🕵️♂️ #MysteryOfTheMissingMuscles"
Commentary:
"When the client says 'make it pop', I'm never quite sure if they want the project to shine like a disco ball 🕺 or if they expect me to start breakdancing on the conference table 💃. Either way, I'm prepared to dazzle with my creativity – in more ways than one! 💥✨"