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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Every time I spend my own money, I feel like somebody needs to reimburse me.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Idiocracy wasn’t supposed to be a documentary.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Stop blaming yourself for your failures. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Your honor, my client would like to play on his phone for a little bit

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

60 minutes ago

3,434

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

Website: We use cookies to improve performance. Me: Same.

Just landed via TikTok:

And for my next trick, I’m going to make this first date the last date.

Making waves on Instagram:

Oasis didn’t just write good songs. They wrote the soundtrack for a whole generation.

Just shared via Reddit:

Milking stools only have three legs, because the cow has the udder.

Just shared via Messenger:

I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Just shared via WeChat:

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

Seen just now on Telegram:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

Seen just now on Discord:

Stop blaming everyone for all of your problems. Pick the one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

Home » Funny Response Quotes

62 Funny response quotes

Funny response quotes 🤣 are the perfect way to sprinkle some humor into your day! Whether you’re texting a friend, commenting on a post, or just looking to lighten the mood, these witty comebacks and snappy one-liners are sure to get a laugh 😂. Dive into a world where humor meets cleverness and discover the art of the perfect response 🚀. Keep your conversations lively and let the giggles commence! 🥳

New funny response quotes 👇

7 hours ago
Share →: I get writer’s block responding to people.

Commentary:
Relatable! My brain just freezes and pretends it's a popsicle! 🍦🧠
1 week ago
Share →: If you respond, “A reason for living,” when a store employee asks if they can help you find something, they will leave you alone.

Commentary:
Well, I guess that's one way to avoid the 'Can I help you?' inquiry! 😆🛍️🚶‍♂️
1 week ago
Share →: If you call me “daddy” in bed, I will immediately stop what we are doing and make you clean your room.

Commentary:
"Guess it's time for some… 'adulting' 🤣🧹🛏️"
2 weeks ago
Share →: I mostly stopped responding to emails three years ago, and aside from various consequences, it’s been fine.

Commentary:
"When you achieve inner peace by turning your inbox into a black hole. 🌌📭😂"
2 weeks ago
Share →: If you respond to emails and Teams messages quickly, you can get away with basically anything at work.

Commentary:
"Breaking News: Speedy replies confirmed as camouflage for workplace shenanigans! 😂📧💨 #EmailNinja"
3 weeks ago
Share →: Sometimes I say “huh,” then answer the question before you can repeat your question.

Commentary:
"Huh? Oh wait, my brain just woke up! 😂🔄#BrainLag"
4 weeks ago
Share →: I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.

Commentary:
"When you reply so fast, even your Wi-Fi gets jealous! 📶😂"
1 month ago
Share →: Landlord: I’m raising your rent. Me: Am I getting a bigger house?

Commentary:
🏠💰 "Landlord: I’m raising your rent.
Me: Cool, so is the house getting taller, wider, or just more sarcastic?" 😂🔑
2 months ago
Share →: Discovered a new coping mechanism called lashing out and making your loved ones resent you.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'make everyone mad and see who sticks around' strategy! 😅🔥 #NotRecommended"
2 months ago
Share →: I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Commentary:
🏡💭😂 Oh, the eternal question – are we really ever at home, or are we just floating through this crazy thing called life? Maybe we're just wandering through the vast expanse of our own minds, never truly grounded in one place. So next time someone asks you if you're at home, just tell them you're in a state of existential limbo!

For even more funny response quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny response quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

60 minutes ago

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

The only way to forget the mistakes you made in the past is to make even bigger and graver mistakes in the present.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

My body snaps, crackles, and pops louder than my cereal.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I successfully avoided the red-eye flight and got the much milder pink eye flight.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Do you ever look into your cats eyes and realize that a person is inside there?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.

Going viral on YouTube:

At the dispensary asking which strain will stop the yearning.

Shared recently on WeChat:

You haven’t experienced proper anger until you have a sister.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Eating trail mix should count as hiking.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

Making waves on Facebook:

All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Everyone is awful in their own special way.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

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