37 Funny simplicity quotes

• Relationships are actually easy when you’re not dating a retard.

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  6 days ago

  actually, communication, dating, easy, humor, insult, relationship, relationships, retard, simplicity

• Love low-hanging fruit. Easiest kind to obtain, in my opinion.

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  6 days ago

  easy, fruit, humor, kind, love, metaphor, opinion, simplicity

• I wanna be a jellyfish— no heart, no brain, no feelings, no pain— just blub blub blub.

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  7 days ago

  animal, blub, brain, emotion, feeling, feelings, heart, humor, i, jellyfish, just, pain, simplicity, wish

• I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

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  1 week ago

  am, compliment, difference, disdain, disinterest, dumb, easier, humor, i, ignorance, irony, life, luck, lucky, much, sarcasm, sarcastic, self-deprecating, simplicity, tell

• My goal for next month is small, simple, and clear: change my whole entire life.

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  1 week ago

  aspiration, change, clear, goal, humor, life, life change, month, motivation, next, self-improvement, simple, simplicity, small, whole

• Getting my next boyfriend a flip phone. He doesn’t need anything more.

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  1 week ago

  anything, boyfriend, dating, flip, flip phone, getting, gift, humor, joke, need, next, phone, relationship, simplicity, tech

• Imagine being a dinosaur. No work or bills. No drama. Just extinct.

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  1 week ago

  being, bills, carefree, dinosaur, drama, extinct, humor, imagine, just, simplicity, work

• My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

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  1 week ago

  6, avoidance, home, humor, i, life, people, queue, simple, simplicity

• The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

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  1 week ago

  able, being, buy, happiness, irony, much, not wanting, secret, simplicity, want, wanting, whatever

• I miss being the age where the most devastating thing in the world was when my sandwiches got cut into squares instead of triangles.

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  1 week ago

  age, childhood, humor, i, nostalgia, sandwich, simplicity, square, thing, triangle, world

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