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Having an existential crisis every time I step outside: Are you my online buddies or just NPCs? 🤔🤖👀
138 Funny sometimes quotes
Sometimes being alive feels like being a pornstar who is asexual.
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Life's just a weird movie I didn't audition for 🎬😅#PlotTwist
I like listening to music in languages I don’t speak because sometimes I just don’t wanna know what anybody is talking about.
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Dancing along happily in blissful ignorance 🎵🤷♂️🎶
Sometimes I’ll pause a YouTube video to scroll on reels. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to be loved genuinely.
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I'm multitasking so hard, even my phone is asking for a break 😅📱❤️
I love when men remind me I’m evil because sometimes I be thinking I’m losing my spark.
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Keeping my inner villain sharp one reminder at a time! 😈✨
We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun to not be able to open that drawer.
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When life gives you mashed potatoes, it locks the drawer for extra flavor! 🥔🔒😂
Sometimes I’ll do a random act of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.
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Silence is golden, and I'm basically Fort Knox! 😂🤐💰
As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”
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Ew: the ultimate superpower for deflecting weirdos. 💁♀️🦸♀️🦹♀️
Can’t believe I spent so many years of my life asking teachers if I was allowed to use the bathroom, and sometimes be told no. What the hell?
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Remembering those days when teachers doubled as restroom gatekeepers 🤔🚪 Who knew bladder control was part of the curriculum? 😂🚽📚
Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.
Commentary:
Ah yes, the great battle of nutritional roulette vs. dependable Dorito dust! 🍎🎲🔶